Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Original poster

Has anyone else heard that children that pretend to be dogs might be being sexually abused - Am traumatised

82 replies

Depravedmum · 07/12/2007 14:52

I just had lunch with a friend and she mentioned that she was recently chatting to a child psychologist who worked on Little Angels. This person had mentioned that ' when children pretend to be dogs all the time - it's a sure sign of abuse'. My toddlers (2 and 4) play 'doggies' all the time - one being the dog and one being 'the owner' so I'm traumatised by this comment. I work four days a week and my children have a nanny who sometimes meets up with her boyfriend with our children. I have met him and thought he seemed okay and I've been very happy with her as a nanny so haven't said anything. But now I'm imagining all sorts of things. I suppose I'm looking for reassurance from people that their children do this and it's a perfectly natural stage of devlopment. I am so upset by this casual comment even though I have no other cause to suspect my children are anything other than healthy and happy.

OP posts:
camillathechicken · 07/12/2007 17:03

has made one other post on the drugs and parenting thread.......

cleaninglady · 07/12/2007 17:37

I work in Child Protection and this is a complete load of rubbish and a Child Psychologist would never make such a statement - ridiculous!!!

Squirdle · 07/12/2007 17:42

Oh for goodness sake, what utter twaddle (I like that word )

I was abused and don't recall playing doggies all of the time. My 2 youngest boys are always dogs (well, obv not always, but you get what I mean) and they most certainly haven't been abused in any way, shape or form.

Strange how depravedmum hasn't come back

mumofhelen · 07/12/2007 17:44

I spoke to a (family) social worker friend of mine and she has never heard of this. Perhaps it's a wind-up.

It's generally accepted that it's a good thing that children play "pretend" games. Go to any toy shop or playgroup, and you will find all sorts of pretend clothes - policeman, doctor, nurses - I wonder what your child psychologist would say/interpret!

TinyTimLivesinVictorianSqualor · 07/12/2007 17:54

My Dc's pretend to be cats, constently. However Ds is never out of my sight, so should I be worried that I am abusing him unknowingly or are cats ok?

I was sure they pretended to be cats because they have one as a pet.

I second squirdle btw, I was abused, I enver pretended to be anything, I was too busy worrying.

TinyTimLivesinVictorianSqualor · 07/12/2007 17:55

constantly and never of course, maybe I am abusing them by faffing up my typing all the time!

Squirdle · 07/12/2007 17:56

Exactly! I too was too busy being scared!

YuleLoveHekateAtSolstice · 07/12/2007 17:59

What a load of crap.

7 yr old ds2 was pretending he could fly yesterday. I suppose this person would claim he's been smoking weed!

Honestly, I think that is nothing to worry about.

OTOH, I'd worry about your friend, who is clearly a stupid twat.

Squirdle · 07/12/2007 17:59

I think actually HappyDaddy summed it up in the first few posts.

"What a load of scaremongering bollocks."

Flame · 07/12/2007 18:02

I spent most of my childhood being a dog.

Unless I have some very impressive memory repressing abilities, I was never abused in any shape or form - not even looked at shifty.

JulesJules · 07/12/2007 18:07

My DDs are always being dogs. Or baby lambs. Or fairy princesses. Or horses. Unicorns. It's called having an active imagination, isn't it? Think your friend is talking bollocks...

OrmIrian · 07/12/2007 18:07

Really? DS#2 used to pretend to be a dog all the time. Now I'm fairly sure he wasn't being sexually abused, but hey what do I know...

lucyellensmum · 07/12/2007 18:29

As we speak my 2 year old room is running around on all fours, barking. She varies between being a horse, dog and cat! So what does that all mean i wonder. I mean, my god, i was even concerned once when she lost some words, chosing to bark instead - no really, she was just over a year old! I have given this all the thought i can possibly can (about 2 seconds) and my scientific conclusion is - what a crock of shit!!

If this wasnt such a serious subject area i would be pmsl.

I have to say, that i hate all of those reality TV child psychology shows, i think they are potentially damaging. I mean, who in their right mind would go on the Telly and dissect their childrens pysche for all to see - seriously weird. I would give more credence to an artical in the Sunday sport.

jellyhead · 07/12/2007 18:48

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

YuleLoveHekateAtSolstice · 07/12/2007 18:55

Were you not even slightly tempted to serve him pedigree chum for lunch?

FrannyandZooey · 07/12/2007 19:11

My ds spends large chunks of time being a black labrador called Sarah

he also enjoys being a donkey and when in role will walk on his hands and knees down the pavement, braying. I walk several steps ahead and pretend he is not with me.

harman · 07/12/2007 19:21

Message withdrawn

Original poster
Depravedmum · 07/12/2007 20:31

Thank you so much for all this. It's exactly what I needed to hear. When my friend told me this (And she wasn't being cruel - just telling me something that had worried her) it was particularly awful because two minutes later my two year old (probably understanding snatches of the conversation) started pretending to be a dog at my feet and I just wanted to cry. I feel fine now and am particularly reassured by people who spend all their time with their children whose children play this game. Thanks again, everyone.

OP posts:
OrmIrian · 10/12/2007 10:21

Not only did my now 4yr old spend all his time being a dog when he was 2 and 3 in the house. He also did it when we were out and about - running about on all 4s when we were in town . When my parents took him out for the day he was a dog almost permanently and at one point cocked his leg on one of the displays in the garden centre. Thankfully the place was seemed to be full of fond grandparents so no-one was terrible offended.

aWorminaManger · 10/12/2007 10:24

Just spotted this, and I'd like to add my children to the many examples already given of children who impersonate dogs. DS1 went through a long phase when he wanted to be called and whistled and asked to fetch sticks, etc., etc.
Glad you have been reassured that there is no need to worry.

aWorminaManger · 10/12/2007 10:25

PS Ormian, my real dog has cocked his leg on Garden Centre displays

OrmIrian · 10/12/2007 10:30

Agghhh... nooo! What did you do? Inside in the nick-nacky, over-priced conservatory furniture and expensive orchids bit, or outside on the terracota planters and ornmantmal fruit trees bit?

aWorminaManger · 10/12/2007 10:34

It was an undercover plants-containing bit (if it had been a nicky-nacky bit I would have regarded it as fair comment!)
I fessed up and lamely said I'd clean it. But they were very cool about it and said not to bother.

loopylou6 · 10/12/2007 11:27

complete crap, my dd and ds (on the very RARE occaison that they get along pretend to be dogs), they crawl round on all fours cocking their legs at the wall and dd plays it herself aswell, and theres now ay on this earth that my kids have been abused, i once heard that children that play with themseloves alot have most likely been abused, now my dd is FOREVER messing with herself, a normal part of development id say

BellaDonna79 · 11/12/2007 17:37

WTF?!?! Agree this sounds like bullshit tbh.
Sorry if i'm sounding too um, graphic here but maybe if they were using it as a opportunity to be, umm, as intimate as dogs sometimes are... exploring parts of anatomy etc.
My kids frequently play house, dd1=mummy, ds1= daddy, dd2= child, dd3=pet dog and dd4 = hamster/car. hmm