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Leave your Brother alone...

3 replies

TreadmillMom · 03/12/2007 10:38

I have 2 DSs aged 4 and 2.
DS1 typical for his age boisterous, cheeky, mischievous, very very loud, imaginative, loving and a pain.
DS2 is also typical for his age finding his own independence but still needing lots of cuddles and reassurance, however, over the last week he seems deeply fed up and unhappy.
I assuming it is his big brothers behaviour towards him but I?m not sure. DS2 has become very whinny, cries all the time and has tantrums at the drop of a hat. He is sleeping well though.
As the sun rises DS1 is very loving towards DS2 but DS2 often rejects his brother (you?ll find out why), he?ll invite him to come play with him etc but as the day unfolds DS1 starts to tease, push, kick and shout at his little brother, he?ll block doorways and throw cushions at him etc and I think DS2 is totally exasperated with the whole situation (as DH and I are), he just does not know where he stands with his brother as he is so Jekyll and Hyde with him. He loves his big brother and gets great pleasure from playing with and entertaining him with his funny babyish ways but then DS1 just turns, for his own amusement.
DS1 is in reception and has been hit and shoved by a lad in an older year, only a couple of times but it has stopped now, the older lad was on a rampage and my DS was not the only victim, so we have tried to get him to empathise with how his brother feels when he treats him this way by getting him to talk about how this older lad made him feel. He agrees, he nods, he talks he promises not to do it again but 5 minutes later DS2 is crying and running to me in a panic and DS1 is laughing and hopping on the spot like some deranged lunatic.
How can I make DS1 stop this behaviour and how can I make DS2 happy?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Lazycow · 03/12/2007 12:02

I don't have any experience of this but this thread is asking a very similar question about sibling rivalry. I know the ages are different but you may find some of the replies useful.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/8/433538

TreadmillMom · 03/12/2007 16:40

Bump

OP posts:
mollymawk · 03/12/2007 16:56

Well, I have DS1 aged 4.5 and DS2 aged 2.5 and earlier in the year (when they were about 9 mths younger) DS1 went through a phase of just being "mean" to DS2, apparently just for the hell of it.
So we decided to adopt a zero tolerance approach. Every day we told DS1 that if he did anything horrible to DS2 he would sit on the step (hope that doesn't make me an evil mother...) or have whatever toy he was playing with taken away, no warnings. And then watched him very carefully for every tiny mean thing he did. He did lots of sitting on the step for a few days but it seemed to do the trick and he was much nicer to DS2 after that! Would that help you perhaps?

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