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Advice please I think my son is a narcissist at 9.

7 replies

Clairelouise2020 · 22/08/2021 13:33

Hey parents/ guardians any one familiar with narcissist behaviour in children. It's a personality disorder. I'm familiar with it in adults my x husband is a narcissist. Im not sure if it's learnt behaviour or it's narcissist behaviour.

Basic functions/ basic questions are extremely difficult. Example - I ask are you hungry - 15 mins later I ask for the yes or no answer.

We can't walk anywhere he constantly looks for praise for walking in a straight line. He is 9.

We can't play basic games ball game he aims for my face. I say no he huffs he now gets grounded and we don't play games any more.

Then there the constant guilt, he asked me why do I leave him alone - I'm in the toilet or outside doing washing or showering my child has never been alone.

He doesn't sleep at night, I was laughing at a program he came out to ask/ demand a answer to what I was laughing at ..

There is so much more I can go on and on but I hope this gives people an idea.. I can't b the only one going through this any advice any information is appreciated

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Leobynature · 22/08/2021 23:48

9 is far too young to label a child with a personality disorder, only adults over 25 are diagnosed as such. At 9 he is still developing his identity. Some of what you describe sounds like typical child behaviour, sometimes they can be annoying

withsexypantsandasausagedog · 23/08/2021 11:33

How do you feel towards him? He might be pickkng up on negative feelings and feeling vulnerable, displaying itself as you describe.

BlueChampagne · 23/08/2021 13:59

What is he like at school? I'd be seeking outside help for this sort of behaviour at that age.

Bombleton · 23/08/2021 18:17

I wonder if you are experiencing some trauma reactions. If you have grown up with narcisstic people around you and your ex husband is narcisstic, it would be unlikely for you to not be.

Reaching out for support is a great start.

When my son was 2 years old he started with "controlling behaviours". But the motivation wasn't to control me, it was to have some control in a world that doesn't make sense to him to reduce his anxiety.

Is it possible that something similar might be going on for your son? Xxx

notHarris · 23/08/2021 22:38

He sounds insecure and looking for relationships, praise and validation. It's upsetting and worrying that you're jumping straight to diagnosing a personality disorder rather than trying to understand and help him.
Have you talked to school about your concerns? They may be able to suggest some parenting classes or groups for you.

Jannt86 · 24/08/2021 10:37

Sorry to be blunt but I think the fact that you'rr labelling a young child as a narcisist might gove you a lot of answers as to why he's having behavioural difficulties...

Clairelouise2020 · 12/09/2021 20:40

I don't think people read my post, I think people heard narcissistic and just went straight to defensive. I'm looking for insight understanding and support. I did say it could b learnt behaviour...

Diagnosed narcissist have admitted to being awear of their ability to manipulate as young as 6.

It's a personality disorder.
Austim wasn't diagnosed till very late in people either.

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