Apologies for the essay! I am looking for some advice or reassurance. My lovely 20 m/o DD is behind developmentally in relation to speech and communication. Walking / fine motor skills etc occurred when expected and are great. No obvious sensory issues - great eater and sleeper.
We noticed around two months ago that she seemed to be in a world of her own a lot of the time, didn't often respond to her name and wouldn't participate in puzzles or games despite encouragement. As a result, we had her ears checked and had a diagnosis of glue ear in both ears, so we know that she was likely hard of hearing for periods of time, possibly for months as she didn't show signs other than pulling at her ears which we had put down to teething / habit. The glue ear seems to be improving and whilst her hearing isn't perfect, it is now within normal ranges according to a recent test. She has shown definite improvement over the last few weeks as she now will look when you say her name (unless distracted), babbles a lot in her own language (she rarely babbled before) and has even repeated a couple of words. She also seems to understand more and will get specific toys from her toy basket when I ask for them (though this is when she feels like it - she will ignore me when she doesn't which I guess is normal toddler behaviour?).
My ongoing concerns are:
- Will point to things she is interested in, but it doesn't seem that it is to show anyone else, it's like it's just for her
- Rarely points to ask for something - will usually just look at it and cry until I give it to her, though she has pointed to ask once or twice recently.
- Still no speech apart from the odd word that is copied as she needs to be prompted
- Sometimes she will be looking at me and seems to zone out - if I move my head her eyes don't follow me so I know she has been in a "dolly day dream"
- Can be hard to get her attention when out and about as she is too busy looking around at other things
- overall she just seems to struggle to communicate - it seems that the understanding is often there, but she just can't reciprocate.
As you can imagine, my anxiety is sky high about it all and the not knowing is awful. The optimistic side of me thinks she is delayed as a result of the glue ear as not hearing well for a potentially long period of time is bound to have had an affect. The less optimistic side cannot ignore the red flags for autism and I inevitably worry about what that could mean for her future. We have an appointment for community paeds in a couple of weeks , but I'm not convinced I will have many answers from it.
Please can anyone offer any advice, experiences or even just some support as whilst I have mainly stayed as positive as possible through all of this as I will love her no matter what, I am really struggling this week with the uncertainty.
Thank you.