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7 year old telling lies

3 replies

Itsbeen84yearss · 04/08/2021 15:51

I’ve caught my dd out in several lies recently. She fibs about small things but lately there’s been two occasions we’re it’s been about bigger things. The first when she basically told her teacher she’d walked to school alone and they rang me up. I was mortified. This is an absolute joke if you knew me. I’m a total worrier. I don’t even leave her with babysitters and haven’t had a night/ day out alone in about two years. The second was she lied about being left out of a certain activity at school and said the teacher had told her she couldn’t join in as I hadn’t paid. She even cried a bit telling me this tale. I’d missed the message on the app and I felt awful at the thought of her left out and crying. I went to email the teacher only to find a cheery message already from the teacher saying that dd had done said activity and I owed x amount. Other more minor occasions she’s said she hadn’t been allowed her dinner at school, water bottle at dance… What to do? I feel like most of her lies are geared towards getting sympathy/ attention but I literally couldn’t give her any more than I do. She has had a new baby sibling recently but I love her to pieces. We do lots of things together. I’ve tried to do one on one things with her as much as possible. I’m very affectionate. Lots of cuddles etc

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Ess1981 · 04/08/2021 20:25

Hi @Itsbeen84yearss

It does seem like she's wanting attention, although you're giving her a lot of love by the sound of it. I had this with one of my DC and I had to just keep on with the loving even when their behaviour wasn't desirable.
They came through and our relationship was stronger too. Hang in there and things will change 💐 hugs xx

Itsbeen84yearss · 04/08/2021 20:44

@Ess1981

Hi *@Itsbeen84yearss*

It does seem like she's wanting attention, although you're giving her a lot of love by the sound of it. I had this with one of my DC and I had to just keep on with the loving even when their behaviour wasn't desirable.
They came through and our relationship was stronger too. Hang in there and things will change 💐 hugs xx

Thanks for replying. So you wouldn’t punish the lying? Time out? Loss of screen time etc? I’ve tried taking to her and telling her mummy loves her and if she wants extra cuddles she just needs to ask. My sister thinks I’m being too soft with her
OP posts:
Ess1981 · 05/08/2021 16:47

Hi @Itsbeen84yearss

It's hard I know but imo they need to know there are consequences for undesirable behaviour, so yes there would be consequences depending on the child (time out or loss of screen time work for mine). I personally found it really hard to master loving discipline - but once I learnt to give a consequence without getting upset it helped in the long run.

With regards to lying specifically, I had to tell one of mine that if they didn't tell the truth I wouldn't know when to believe them - and a number of occasions happened where said child missed out because I honestly didn't know if they were telling the truth or not.

HTH a bit - hopefully someone else can chip in with some more advice too FlowersBrewCake x

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