2 yr old whining so much never is it normal

[itscomplicatedlife]

Our 2 year old just seems to whinge so much and when she starts sometimes it can go on for so long and it's just driving me barmy, the sound is so depressing, nothing we do helps, it seems to be tiredness or heat or just that she can't have something but it just seems so over the top!! It's awful to live with, could there be something wrong with her? She's not very sociable either in the park with other children she will go incredibly shy and a lot of times she won't even look at the other kids if they come close which I find so strange, they can wave and she just wants to hide, she will
Warm to them eventually but takes ages! This is perhaps just normal toddler behaviour but the whinging is awful

Prob is totally normal terrible two behaviour it's just got a bit much this last month, the heat is not helping, just fed up of it, such a depressing sounds it's exhausting, drives you batty are times

It sounds within the rhelms of normal although admitedly the slightly more challenging end of normal tbh. It's hard I know. My 3YO is similar and quite an 'avoidant' personality type and it is draining. Other people don't always realise how draining as it's quite subtle. I think all you can do is acknowledge that she's upset and remind her she needs to use her words or you can't help her and be nurturing but try not to let it change what you're doing. Like any negative behaviour it will continue if they think it's getting them something. With the playing thing I think their ability to really 'play' with another kid is very much emerging at age 2 and most kids won't be that good at it. Mine is a real sweetheart with other kids and getting more confident at initiating play with others. What I did was mirror how to approach another kid and start a conversation with a child and their parent. I mostly just wanted to say I feel your pain. To be fair it has been incredibly warm. If you're not already then maybe set a paddling pool up or some water play and try not to expect too much of the day. We Brits are not made for this heat lol x

My DD was like this when she was a toddler with crying/moaning about everything and extreme shyness. With grandparents etc as well not just strangers or other kids. She would have a meltdown if granny came to visit. It was hard!

Anyway she's 6 now and a lovely little girl! She can still get a bit emotional and does struggle sometimes with new environments but generally she's great, doing well at school, lots of friends etc. So don't worry! I'm sure it will pass. My DD started to get easier from about 3.

@Jannt86 awww just needed this reply!! God this heat I can't cope with it I'm literally
Melting even in front of the fan! Wow!! Some great tips there too, thank you! I have had remind ourselves not to pay much attention to the Unwanted sounds, like if it's unacceptable I say so in a form manner using brief few words then we try to ignore it but if it goes on I cuddle her until she calms then try to set her back down but hard in this heat she wants me but is making me melt too eeek! Thanks again though and praying for some wind soon lol!!

@imamearcat yes meltdowns at grandparents!' My partners she is terrified of it just doesn't like them, we don't see them much at all after a few very Awful displays they think she hates them so mortifying!! But she loves my dad and step dad! Can't work it out at all!

Oh crikey that's a relief then! I can't wait until this stage is over! It was that bad earlier I even pulled out an old dummy! I'd saved it as a keep sake but she wasn't to be fooled and had none of it! This heat is killing her tbh and makes things ten times harder, lady above made me realise I do need to lower the old expectations it's very true and just wack a pool outside in the shade and go from there 😃 thanks a lot for your reply it's a bloody relief to read that there is potential light at the end of this crazy time of it all!! X x x

@itscomplicatedlife I once read that difficult toddlers can become lovely children and I've clung on to that thought! Would say it seems to becoming reality.

Good luck!

@imamearcat I really hope so, sometimes I just think I'm sure she's the worst for doing this than I've ever seen, she can just go on for so long and I get so exasperated by it, sometimes I have to get ear plugs out also and I have had to pop her back in the cot if she's just simply woken up in a bad mood, did you ever feel like that/have that sort of experience?

We have noticed she can literally wake up in a great mood but on other days, feels like most days she wakes up in a terrible mood and this is usually when we end up popping her back in the cot, she gets so mad but after 5-10 mins bring her out abs she comes out of it, anywhere else we try to place her doesn't really work luckily the cot does, hard to know what to do sometimes or if your even doing the right thing too x x

Yes that does ring a bell! She tended to be ok if it was just me/DH around but she even didn't like DH that much for a while!

Is she fine developmentally? She's probably just very sensitive. Honesty my DD now is an angel she tries so hard to be a good girl. She does get overwhelmed / emotional sometimes but she is so lovely, there is hope!

My DS on the other hand was such a chilled baby/toddler but now he's a bit older (4) he's completely mental, sweet, but a complete loon and much more of a handful!

@imamearcat our daughter just seems almost too on the ball for her age, she doesn't sleep a lot either, this last few months the nursery have been letting her nap 12.30-2 so she isn't getting tired for bed until 8.30/9 which is so late! I've been reading lots of mumsnet threads about bed times for her age and most seem to be in bed by 7.30 latest! I've tried to ask the nursery a few times to shorten the nap or bring it forward to earlier in the day as I just think it's either too long or too late. A lot of girls I work with theirs though nap the same amount of time and are still in bed by 7-7,30 it just seems to be ours. She hardly napped at alll on mat leave it was exhausting and if she did it had to be on me, I found it quite exhausting as couldn't even take a shower some wks as we were up at 6 and a lot of the time we're up in the nihht, no nap and she still wouldn't be in bed until 8 which has just got later. Sorry for moaning I just seem to see so many other kids on what I feel is a better routine and it's just ours that's always been so exhausting