Hi, I hope someone can help me!
I have a four year old who is a naturally very quiet and timid child. He is not in any way boisterous or loud. He only began to talk at 3 and a half years as we found out quite late that his hearing was impaired and had grommets fitted. Talking slowly began and he was discharged from SALT at 4 years old.
He has been attending pre-school, and settled in well. Enjoys going and chats about it afterwards when he gets home.
However, the teacher has informed me that when the group sings, he becomes very upset. I attended his pre-school for a day to see how things go, and yes, he sang the first song with the other children, and when it was finished he began to cry uncontrollably and then was afraid to join in there after. I find this very strange as his favorite thing to do at home is sing and dance. I honestly cannnot tell how to help him? The teacher also said he reacts the same at group story time. This is also alien to me as he loves books and stories at home and constantly asks for them to be read?
The health visitor at pre-school also spoke to me about how he is very quiet in the playground and prefers his own company, she also mentioned he 'dis-associates' with everything gong on around him, which I disagreed with as he can relay to me the children's names, what they done that day and different things that had happened e.g. a child fell and hurt his knee.
He is very quiet around knew people, groups of children etc. and very chatty and confident at home.
Autism has been mentioned to me, however I find it hard to agree with this as I have zero concerns outside of school, he is very sociable with family and friends, no issues in large crowds or loud noises, eats well, sleeps well and speaks well. Again can be quite shy but but will speak and interact and play.
I was very surprised at his reactions in playgroup as it is so out of character. He began to cry uncontrollably and have a melt down for a toy at play group, which again, I have never seen him do and found it so strange and was shocked at his reactions and behavior.
His learning is fantastic and I don't have any worries about this. The teacher says he does all the tasks he is asked to do efficiently.
Has anyone ever came across something like this, I am starting to feel like the health visitors and teachers think I am lying about how this is so strange to me and he is like a different child at home?
He has a younger sister who is 2 and they are like best mates, sharing is not an issue and they play with each other all day long.
Also, he seems to be more talkative with other children when I am there or when it is in our home. Outside of home, he is extremely quiet. I have watched him try to talk to other children and it is like he doesn't know what to say and if he does speak they have no interest and walk away. for example, I watched him in play group take a book to another child and point to the picture of the mouse and started to say 'look at this mouse' and the child just walked away.
I have no idea how to help him and my heart is broke trying to think of ways to help him come out of his shell a little in other places, and also trying to convince healthcare professionals that he is a different child at home!
Very hard to watch and a huge worry for primary 1.
Any ideas or any similar problems to share would be so helpful right now!