8 year old boys.....help?

[littleboo]

I read a post recently when someone was saying their 6 year old seemed to have lost his"joy".
I am getting increasingly worried about ds1 and am beginning to wonder if he could be suffering from depression.?
he also seems to have lost his "joy", constantly moaning, nothing pleases him, always looking very sad. he is a great little footballer and plays for a team, but even his coach says how moody he is. he also said he seemed very down the other day!
I can't seem to do right for doing wrong. I don't know whether to shout at him, cuddle him, cry.....just at the end of my teather. He is the middle one of 3, youngest 3, oldest 12.
My mum ( who's not the most sensative, has said he has always been like it, which doesn't help.
I did suffer from PND, which wasn't picked up until he was a year old.
Can anyone offer some advice, just don't know what to do anymore.

Littleboo
It is unlikely that he is going to want be glum so I wouldn't get frustrated with him. I do understand your frustration though. - DS went through a period like this and it was difficult to handle, i think because if our kids feel sad we feel responsible.
With my DS after a LOT of talking we found he wasn't very happy at school and was also still quite upset about his brother who had developmental problems. He had always fronted to us as if he was coping because he thoughtw we had 'enough to deal with'
I would try and talk to him, and talk to the school and find out if something is bothering him. Could he be being bullied for example - kids will often try and conceal that sort of thing from their parents.
I don't know if this will help but i also bought some really good multi vitamins and minerals for DS as (looking back) some of it was that he was growing and very active but not eating enough good stuff and it was making him a bit tired and worn out.
I hope you sort it out. I know it is a hrad one to deal with

thanks pagwatch
have tried to talk to him, but he says either nothing is wrong , or he doesn't know.
Did thinking about going into school just to see how is is there.
Thanks for the idea about diet, he is very active and does find it hard to get up in the morning so i think i should get some vitamins to try.
Yesterday it just reduced me to tears cos i just didn't know what else to do. dh thinks its just a phase, but to me it seems as if he has always been like it. Over the years I've found myself making excuses for him especially in front of my mum. And to be honest there are times when I feel as if I don't like him anymore and thats breaks my heart.

oh Littleboo
I do know what you mean! But this isn't your fault and its not surprising that you are getting frustrated because he can't tell what is going on.
Does his older sibling have any ideas? Does he have many friends that 'support' him ( in their little 8 year old way )?
I would go and talk to the school just to get their feedback. Even if they have nothing significant to tell you now they may have a teacher he especially relates to that could try and talk to him?

Let me know how it goes.
PS tell your mother to choose does she want to help or to shut up

mother has always been unhelpful. we don't see her often, but she will even say something about him in front of him
last time it was " is he ever happy, or just the most miserable child" or something like that. I was so upset last time, that I did say something to her, but it didn't help.
Think it would be useful to go into school as you say to see how he relates to others.
he does have friends, has tham over, goes to theirs etc - just can't put my finger on what it is.
Older sis just thinks he is miserable some of the time.

Thing is aswell, he just looks miserable most of the time as well which makes me even more sad. Some of it I guess could be age related, he's very argumentative and sulky. Just don't want to feel that i've missed something