help! DS gone mad!

[dairylea4brains]

my 2.6 yo is a daling caring child who is helpful and good. Recently though he has become a monster, out with the bedtime routine and fantastic sleeping (1:45am he fell asleep last night on me downstairs!) He now sings (loudly) and shouts til we tell him of or sneaks back downstairs. He runs round the house screaming at the top of his lungs and banging and jumping on everything in sight.

He goes nursery 3 morns a week and we walk the dog and go swimming a lot so he has lots of exercise. I try to do stuff with him but he wants to do it all his self. He has gotten quite destructive and the naughtys tep used to work a treat but now it doesnt faze him. me and his dad are quite strict with him but nothing works and i am reduced to screaming at him all day, he cries and i feel like poo!

what is going on with him??? he is bright and very mature for his age, copled with his height he often gets mistaken for 3+.

Im at my wits end and feeling very stressed, me and partner discussing having another child but i canno do that if all im doing is running around after son shouting at him!

Probably just his age - irritating but almost certainly true. Some children don't 'do' the terrible twos straight away but wait until they have lulled you to into thinking your little angel isn't going to conform to the stereotype. Mine was one of those - two was fine, as he approach three he really hit his stride!

dairylea4brains (great name BTW)

My 'normal' MN nickname is Boys Are Like Dogs ie mine need a dammed good run twice a day.

This behaviour is perfectly normal, my only advice would be to try not to sweat the small stuff, ignore ignore ignore.

Plus try to praise the behaviour you want to see more of.

He's testing boundaries, exploring his powers and being a bright little chap has discovered how to press your buttons.

HTH

Do rapid return at bedtime, keep going and don't give in, he is pushing you and testing his boundaries he needs to know you are film and won't give in (once he gets an inckling he can play you that will be the start of the fun!) You need to be really really tough and show him bedtime is bedtime.

Stop shouting, the more the shout the more hyped up he becomes and the less likely he is to do as he is told, reward him for anything and everything he does that is good, keep stickers in ur pocket and give him one everytime he does hes told etc and keep on with the naughty step, like i said he's just pushing it.

It's hard work but if you are tough it will pay off, don't let him get away with now because if you do he will carry and and get worse! (imo)

when i say start of the fun i mean for him, not you!

thanks guys, just feel really alone with this!! moved here last xmas, family half hour away and even though DS goes pre school have no friands in area AT ALL! Im not a loner honest!

Hav eno other mums to share this with so do not know if anthing is normal or not...I try to be strict (manners etc) but he DOES know how to push my buttons and he can turn on the charm very easily so i give in.

The one thing I learnt from having my first child was DO NOT GIVE IN< NEVER NEVER GIVE IN, giving in once means the next time they want their own way they will go on and on twixce as much because they remember you gave in last time!

Give them praise and stickers when they are being good, give them attention for being good, ignore the bad and dont give in.

Are you going to toddler groups? Coffee afternoons etc?

My ds2 is exactly the same - he's 2.2 and won't start preschool until next June
He's been poorly this week so I can forgive his behaviour a bit, but last night at 11.30 he woke up(quite unusual for him) and had the most enormous tantrum because I wouldn't let him come into our bed.He's just started doing this thing in his cot where he balknces upside down when he's stroppy - very strange.
I agree with Love My Girls - don't give in. It's very easy to and it's hard work but it'll pay off in the end.

don't worry, he sounds just like my dd1 who I swear will enter politics if her capacity for manipulation and apparent thick skin is anything to go by. I dispair sometimes. The naughty step and stickers don't work either (she is 2.10) and it's so hard to not loose the plot, particularly when her sister (12 months) is has just done a poo when we are about to leave the house when we already half an hour late and then dd1 will start stamping on the phone or something similar. You are not alone and we just have to hope that it's a phase and what doesn't kill us, makes us stronger!

hi lovemygirls...DS goes to pre school 3 mornings a week and we go swimming at local gym...i dont know anyone round here and dont know any groups i can go to. he used to go to a music toddler group but he found it quite babyish. gymboree didnt work either. he loves his nursery though. feel like he needs a playmate outside of nursery!

I think being overly strict with toddlers is generally counterproductive. You get locked into a battle of wills and the more you shout, the more they shout, it's a vicious circle!

I would really recommend 'How not to be a perfect mother' by Libby Purves.

It's a little old fashioned but full of useful advice on how to keep your child busy without getting locked into rows with them.

A lot of the time distraction is the best method eg if you see a tantrum coming get them busy with a new activity