9 month old - no affection or chill?!

[Dav87]

Hi
My 9 month old LG shows absolutely no signs of affection to me, and it’s really starting to get me down 😞 She will push me away if I try to hug her or hold her, doesn’t want to sit on my lap or even near me, just constantly wants to be on the move and grabbing at things.
I can’t read to her cos she won’t sit still long enough, and she isn’t interested in any activities or games I try to play with her. I’ve even tried to put films or tv shows on, which I don’t really want to do, just so that she’ll sit on my lap and we can have a snuggle on the sofa, but she just screams and shouts to get down.
I’m so worried that I’ve done this to her, by trying so hard in the early days to get her “self-soothe” and just wanted to put her down all the time and get her used to a crib etc. I now wish I’d known more about the 4th trimester, and would do it so differently if I did it again, would savour every minute of contact, hugs, napping together...
I just feel like she doesn’t like me very much and would rather be on her own 😞
Any advice or reassurance would be great - thank you so much x

During the 4th trimester I don’t think my DS was put down once. He did all naps either on the boob or in the sling and co slept with me overnight. Proper Velcro baby, zero self soothing. At 10 months he’s now very similar to your DD. He literally only wants to be held now to either be carried around to look at things or to be assisted in trying to walk. If I try and cuddle him he arches his back and pushes away. I therefore don’t think it’s anything you did or didn’t do when she was tiny. At this age they are processing so much more and are desperate to get moving. If your baby has a more driven temperament, they aren’t going to tolerate being restrained, which is effectively what a cuddle is. They don’t understand a cuddle is affectionate yet - at least that’s what I’m telling myself! x

Mine was like this. I too felt like I'd done something wrong and also felt a bit rejected. I felt like he didn't favour me over other adults. But now at 3 yo he is a big soft Mummy's boy, asks for cuddles and won't let me out of his sight.

Oh my 10 month old is like this, don't worry. He was soooooo snuggly when he was tiny. Now he just wants to go off and crawl around, exploring the world. I only get to snuggle him when I feed him to sleep now. My 2.5 year old has never been very snuggly though...