how can I boost my 6 yr old dd's confidence?

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We have just had dd's mid term report (she is in Yr 2); there were no surprises but dd was very upset at being described as 'immature' and 'shy'. There were lots of good things in the report but she has totally ignored those and taken this comment very much to heart, and is saying she does not want to go to school on Monday She is a June baby so one of the youngest anyway.

I beleive a lot of her 'immaturity' is due to lack of confidence because when she is not nervous or is really interested in somehting she is fine.

I would love to know how to help her and boost her confidence but cannot think what more to do.

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How about Rainbows or drama class?

Well i think the best thing you can do for her confidence would be to talk to the teacher who spoke of her in those terms! Is this a state school? I really am surprised to hear that a teacher would describe an infant school child in those terms.

How on earth can it be constructive in any way for a teacher to talk about whether she is shy or not? Far better to couch it in terms of say, needing encouragement in that area or development or something......and being described as immature....at 6? And as one of the youngest in the year? WTF???

No wonder she doesn't want to go to school on Monday, poor thing.

I really think, at 6, she is fine. Many, many children are shy and unconfident; of course they are; their experience of life is so little, and they sense that they need help and support, and also some 'shy' children are simply bright and have a high level of self awareness because of that, which can make them self conscious.

Just give your dd time, let her pursue her own interests and things she is good at, and her confidence will increase.

I really think the only problem here is that teacher's way of expressing things! Do you think the teacher is ok, normally?

Promoting self confidence is hard but can be done pretty easily - eg she tidys up - you can praise her for being a fantastic tidier upper! or she paints a picture - you say you like the picture and she has really worked hard on it - display her work, all things that you already do and maybe get her involved in activities that she is interested in and would boost her confidence eg gymnastics, horseriding, rainbows etc

Thanks everyone for the ideas.

We already do Beavers and that has helped a little - it is just taking time and it doesn't really help that no one in her year does Beavers so she has no real friends there whereas most of the others know several from school.

The teacher is a wonderful teacher and I am sure she is helping dd - she was not as blunt as the way I put it, but dd just latched onto those words iyswim. She is very shy and would rarely talk in groups, or to adults generally; she is much better but still shy so when she is talking to adults she behaves in a very silly (immature!) way - high pitched voice, not full sentences etc

I like the idea of drama class or dancing but cannot find one locally that is not fixated on competitive shows which would not be good as she is far too competitive and hates losing!

I had not thought about 'shy' children having a high level of self awareness making them self conscious - I am sure that is correct about dd. We had a bit of a chat and she is definitley wary of failing so will not always try new things.

In a lot of ways she would be better in a lower year, being the oldest - she plays very well with ds's friends in Yr 1. She is great with my 2.5 yr old neice, but often reverts to being the 'baby' when with her older cousins

Dh and I have decided to try and do lots of fairly grown up things with her, like museums (which she loves ) and she also wants to go shopping for clothes . We haven't really done this in the past as ds would hate such things but i realise now that is being unfair to her

We have parent's evening next week so hopefully I can get some pointers from the teacher too