Hi everyone
I'm Emily. My little boy has just turned 2 a few weeks ago. He's my first and only child.
I have anxiety and am an over thinker/worrier, so I'm seeking some wisdom/advice/insight that may help me.
My son goes to nursery 1.5 days a week, and has done since he was 7 months old. On the additional 3.5 days he is currently at my parents' who we have formed a childcare bubble with. My husband and I both work full-time.
He is generally a playful chatty happy little boy. His most recent Health Care Visit went well, and his speech and language is very developed for his age.
As a result of Covid & lockdown, like most people we've barely seen family and friends for the best part of 12 months. My little boy has had very minimal exposure to other people outside our childcare bubble and nursery. Specifically, he's had next to no play and interaction with children other than in nursery.
About 4 weeks ago when I collected him from nursery they told me that he had been pushing other children. Not all day, not with force or aggression, but when over excited and 'giddy' he is pushing them around. Since then, there have been some nursery days where he hasn't pushed and some where he has.
His behaviour at nursery beyond this is great.
They are starting to use the ABC matrix to monitor his behaviour and look for any triggers or trends. It is frustrating for me as I haven't seen the pushing given we've been unable to interact with others outside of nursery.
Now nursery have said not to worry, and that it isn't uncommon for a young toddler of his age (2) to display this type of behaviour as they're still learning and finding ways to express themselves. However, I do worry!! Thanks to be an anxiety sufferer it is now on my mind loads.
We are a happy family, he hasn't been exposed to any violence or aggression at home, or even any shouting and arguments. At my parents he most definitely gets away with anything and they are not great at being firm (soft grandparents) but again, he isn't seeing this type of behaviour there.
I guess what I'm hoping to gain from this post is the answer to some of the questions rattling around in my head....
a) What can I do to try and understand this behaviour better, and resolve it?
b) Could I possibly be doing something to cause it without realising?
c) At what point should I consider it may be an indicator of ADHD or something similar? If at all...
c) If you've experienced similar traits with your child, what tips do you have?
I have noticed at home and at my parents he does show signs of violence and aggression. Those words sound so extreme but what I've noticed is when he is over tired & cranky, or when he is being boisterous and not getting his way he will hit and/or nip us; and be quite cross in his use of words and tone. I always tell him 'No, play nicely or be kind, or that isn't nice or we dont hit people', but should I be doing something different. Is this normal for a toddler?
I'm quite worried about and ultimately just want him to be happy and play nicely.