Similar stories, 4 year old behaviour

[Dreamland13]

Hi

Just wondered if anyone had dealt with similar, whether I can do anything to help more etc
My little one has been in nursery since she was 10 months old, she goes to school in September and has always been generally fine, nothing too stand out, a few hitting incidents with other kids around the 2-3 year age but grew out of that.
Recently her nursery has said that she gets very very stressed/upset over small things (ie not being called to help with set up) she can sometimes get a bit stressed at home if she can’t do something like do her shoe up or her drawing doesn’t go ‘right’ I’ve said she just needs to ask for help.
We have addressed the behaviour at nursery and it has been improving, but sometimes I think it just depends on the day if she’s in one of those moods/tired etc
nursery said they’ll also work on it. They’ve said she’s very bright and overall very good but gets very frustrated, more so than others.
Just wondered if people have had this and anything that worked to improve it? I know it’s probably generally normal but just sounds like she’s a little to the extreme side. Just don’t want her to get upset at school.

Thank you

Hi there, there is a lot of change and worries our children can experience, especially starting school. My boy is starting primary school in September and I'm reading specific books to prepare that step. Once we've read the book several times, we are drawing pictures or playing out the themes such as 'change', 'feelings' and 'asking for help'.

We all have a 'stress system' or a window of tolerance. When we feel calm, focussed and alert, we feel great, When we feel a little stress, we learn coping strategies. When we feel overwhelmed we behave differently - e.g angry, upset or withdrawn.

At the end of this short clip there are useful techniques to learn to help us get back into our window of tolerance.

This article explains some of our stress behaviours too. just ignore the behaviour chart bit.
raising2children.com/should-our-children-have-a-behaviour-chart/

I love evidence-based research to help me parent, however, our children are intricate. We are finding our feet together with our family and therefore I always need to remind myself - there's no quick fix or perfect parenting. Please see the above as my thoughts as a fellow mum and nothing more x