Should I be thinking about autism?

[Penguinbananas]

DD already had an ASD and ADHD diagnosis.

Her brother is 4 with identified global delay but I hadn't really suspected ASD recently but now I'm wondering if I should be asking re him too..

Things that have been noticed

Limited eye contact
Shockingly poor social skills
Poor speech
Significant fine motor delays
It is really difficult to engage him. His SALT latest review is the autism bucket task.
He has his little routines like routes and certain cups and plates.
He has sensory stuff
He flaps
He gets very overexcited
He is obsessive about water. His favourite thing is filling the sink, letting it out and putting his ear on the pipe to hear it
He only really likes organising/building play
His understanding and ability to follow instruction isn't great

Am I seeing things or should I be pursuing autism?

How old is he? In any event I wouldn't be pushing or trying to pursue a diagnosis. Stop trying to label him and just let him catch up. My son is speech delayed and doesn't make wonderful eye contact at times but he's getting better with both aspects so I'm just letting him catch up. And he's nearly 3 !! Everyone tells me he's fine and to give him time so I am. Everyone these days seems so obsessed to label their child autistic it really does shocken me

@highschoolneverends he is 4yr4m, due to start school in September and if there is one thing I have learnt from his sister that having the label (if its correct) is crucial to access the support. He has an EHCP based on his GDD but if he is autistic too then it might be beneficial for him. I just don't know im I'm seeing things or not.

I think the best signs would have present before he was 2YR old - i.e. not pointing to share interests or request, not showing, weak social referencing, lack of pretend play, unable to follow simple instructions, etc - deficits in some of these areas at 18M old tend to have high probabilities of a future diagnosis.

@AladdinMum its always a bit tricky to remember how was around then as so much of our lives is ASD friendly because of his sister. He still struggles to follow simple instructions and has very poor pretend play.

@Penguinbananas my son has rubbish pretend play and apparently I was the same as a child - I'm now a perfectly functioning adult. It's no biggie to want to pretend play, some people like myself and my son are more logical and would rather do the real thing.

@highschoolneverends with the greatest respect your son is nearly 3, 18 months younger than mine. My older DD has no pretend play and fully likely isn't going to become a fully functioning adult so neither of your posts have actually done anything but make me feel rubbish that I already have one "labelled" and am concerned about the other

If he were my child, I think I would be asking the question. As you say, if he has it, then having that diagnosis may help him get more appropriate support.

I suppose it's possible that it is just a reflection of his GDD – lots of the 'red flags' for autism are behaviours that are quite normal in younger children, and he is developmentally younger than his age. However, I also think it's not uncommon for a diagnosis of GDD to become a diagnosis of autism as the child gets older, and you obviously have experience with ASD with your DD, so if you're asking the question internally (and on here), I think I'd ask it of the professionals.

I agree with the previous person, I think you have grounds to enquire with a health professional and then take it from there.

I think the responses from @highschoolneverends are a bit rude if I'm honest. It is not a case of labeling, it is accessing the correct support and making sure you are doing all you can. I do see a lot of anxiety on here around children who sound perfectly fine. But I think that's a sign of our times and we are almost too aware of our milestones etc now. Google is your worst enemy!

It can't help to discuss your child's progress with a professional and then you may find some answers at least.

Does he go to nursery? It is possible that some things could be due to GDD and others because his main role model is his older sister. Eg if she never pretends play he might not realise that is even a thing you can do. If he goes to nursery and sees other kids his age a lot though then that wouldn't be it.