At the end of my tether

[zooloo88]

I’m at the end of my tether and need to know I’m not alone/ others have got through this, my DS is 6 weeks and he just hasn’t adjusted to the world at all he constantly cries ( ALL the time
) unless he is either feeding or sleeping and it’s really affecting me being able to bond with him as I’m just dreading every day like this and it’s having Knock on affect with my relationship with my OH:

Since birth we have had issues and hospital stays because of his feeding and tongue tie, the tongue tie is now sorted but feeding is an issue he always looks / sounds in so much pain with his tummy he screams, goes red in the face, pulls his legs to bum constantly and I can hear the noises in his tummy - he screams when he’s picked up , screams when he’s put down it really is impossible and we get very little sleep! I really do feel for him, I’ve tried infancol and changing his milk to comfort formula but that didn’t help so GP suggested coleaf and that made things 100 times worse so she has now prescribed gaviscone but I’m unsure that’s going to help as he has trapped wind/ tummy issues and I thought gaviscone was for reflux!?

I’m just feeling so drained we have no support bubble and OH is working - I just can’t see the light this will ever get better and all my maternity leave will be like this

It will get better but all my three babies only got better around 4/5 month mark. Hang in there. It will get better and before you know it you'll be wanting another. I remember thing settling with my first and it was honestly like the Wizard of Oz when it runs technicolour.

Could have written this about my now 6 month old. The first 100 days of his life nearly ended me. Screaming, not sleeping or struggling through feeds. You have my utmost sympathy.

My LB has cows milk protein allergy (patient.info/allergies-blood-immune/food-allergy-and-intolerance/cows-milk-protein-allergy) which could be something you could chat to your GP/HV about if the reflux meds aren’t helping. Honestly though? I think the allergy was a pretty minimal part of his behaviour - a lot of newborns just cannot cope with being born it would seem.

I’m pleased to report he is so much better now. Very emotionally labile and still a rotten sleeper. A high needs baby - certainly not east. But I love being a mum now and enjoy my time with him immensely.

It’s okay to say you are struggling as well. Having never experienced mental health problems I plunged into PND deeply. Talking therapy and antidepressants have helped.

Good luck x

Sounds exactly like my son! Is he breastfed or formula fed do you mind me asking?

It will get better I promise but right now I know how tough it feels!! It sounds a lot like he might be suffering from silent reflux (assuming he's not vomiting any more than usual baby spit up after a feed?). You might find he's happier if he's held upright on your shoulder for a good 30mins after a feed to give his tummy some time to digest the milk, try burping him part way through a feed (even if breastfeeding) to give his tummy a bit of help in digesting the food. Try raising the head of his cot mattress using a book propped under the legs to give him a slightly inclined sleeping position which will help keep the milk down in his tummy. Gaviscon takes a while to work, from my memory about a week? But it does make things a bit better, in the end though we ended up moving my son to omeprazole when he was 12 weeks as he was still in pain from the reflux and that helped tremendously.

By the way don't use gavsicon and infacol at the same time as they contradict each other! Infacol makes more bubbles in their tummy so they do more burps. Gavsicon makes the milk heavier and denser and thicker so it stays down and doesn't get regurgitated back up into their throat (reflux) causing pain and fussiness

Agree with pp above, don't use reflux and colic remedies at the same time as they do conflicting things, colic stuff can make it worse if it's reflux. My DS was like this and turned out to have reflux and CMPA, gaviscon can make them constipated so you could see if the doctor will prescribe ranatadine or omeprazole and see if that helps, if it's silent reflux it could. Look out for signs of CMPA too. Whatever it is it will pass, but sending hugs as it's super hard at this stage having an unhappy baby.