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19 month old not not talking

2 replies

mumto1toddler · 01/01/2021 13:58

Feeling like a pretty rubbish mum today to be honest. I've been concerned about DDs speech for a while now and I was lucky enough to get the full two weeks off for Christmas so promised myself I'd really focus on spending as much time as poss teaching/learning and playing in order to hopefully help her out - however I've somehow developer Covid symptoms (awaiting result now) and can just about do the basics (cooking/feeding/bathing) and so she's basically been playing with her toys or snuggling with me watching films. We've managed small amounts of play and of course I'm still talking to her and engaging but I just feel like she's not only had the most boring week (we've not let the house apart from a quick walk around the garden yesterday and it's just us two here), I also feel like I've possibly made this development lag even worse, especially by letting her watch so much tv.

I suppose I'm looking for some reassurance that this week won't have made things worse, and if anyone's got any stories of children her age not speaking please let me know?

I spoke to the HV a few weeks ago and she said to just keep trying and talking to her and we've got another review next week. My DD understands most things and other than her not talking, I don't have any other concerns.

OP posts:
Genzymoo · 01/01/2021 19:32

I’m probably not going to be a huge amount of help, but didn’t want to read and walk away.

I have two DD’s; oldest nearly 4 and youngest 18 months. Oldest DD (from recollection) seemed to be right on track for her speech milestones. My 18 month old seems a way behind in terms of speech. We have babbling, a couple of words and sounds for certain things (eg ‘Nia’ means snack’.

I am a worrier when it comes to development, and spoke to my HV a couple of weeks ago. She took me through some questions geared towards more general development, as well as those specific to comprehension and communication (does she point to something when she wants it, does she understand when you say you are going to put shoes on, etc). The HV felt that she was on track, but perhaps just focusing on developing her skills in other areas (her fine motor skills are better than my older DD’s was at that age, etc).

Don’t punish yourself for not being able to work on this over the Christmas period. There is very little you can do about it if you are ill, and you should give yourself credit for being able to meet basic care needs and provide stimulation. Not being able to focus on developing her speech over the break is not going to have any sort of lasting impact; consistency and regularity is far more important, so try just to make sure that you carve out a period of time every day to focus on it.

You are doing the right thing by liaising with your HV and getting their advice.

As someone who spends much of her time berating herself for not spending enough time with the children, doing enough activities, supporting their development, etc, I can see the hallmarks in someone else!

Try not to worry yourself too much - different things take different times with different children - knowing the relevant milestones is helpful, but remember that they are only guidelines!

Nboo · 03/01/2021 21:57

My DS (now 5) spoke very late. He babbled a lot as a baby but didn't really say any recognisable word except for "car" for 8 months (second word was "van" at about 2 and 1 month which sounded like "ban"). Even as a baby he would not copy words we said to him, no matter how much we tried, so no mama or dada etc. His 2 year assessment was rubbish - delayed speech so potentially needed to see speech therapist, and got told he was too heavy could end up being obese (DS has always been top of percentile in weight but eats very healthily, plus he went to nursery full time and ate there). We just ignored HV and carried on as normal. I must say full time nursery helped a lot. After 2 they started using flash cards to help with DS's speech. It suddenly took off and now he would not stop talking lol.
Btw, DS was also a late crawler/walker. His 9 months assessment was also rubbish as his gross motor development was so delayed. He did not learn to jump off a step until he was nearly 4. And he struggled walking the stairs without our help for AGES. But he learned to ride a bike without stabilisers before he turned 4. DH often say I worried to much back then because look at him now.

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