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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

When your 2yr old started messing about at nap time, what did you do?

76 replies

LoveMyGirls · 23/10/2007 12:54

Did you give in straight away or did you fight for a while?

DD and mindee are both 2 and this past week have been playing up at naptime, throwing things out of the cot, laughing at each other etc but if they don't have a nap they are both miserable and have tantrums all afternoon, yesterday I drove round for 30 mins before coming home after we had been out and they both slept for 1-2hrs, today we have been out walking and both are definatly tired but fighting it, I have put mindee up first so they don't distract each other and after about 10mins of crying has gone to sleep. Dd2 who instegated the naptime refusal is still up having her pudding and I'm wondering how I should be dealing with this? Should I just accept the fact they are not napping in the afternoon anymore?

Ok since i started typing this, dd2 has now gone up and is chatting to herself, i'm crossing my fingers very tightly that she goes to sleep and doesnt wake mindee.

Any words of advice?

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Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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Washersaurus · 24/10/2007 16:35

My 2.2 DS won't nap anymore either - it is hell around here at around 5.30 ish as he is so tired (actually so am I)

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 24/10/2007 19:25

Well... Tue is she didn't sleep at all and wasn't too bad but today she hasn't slept either and has been grumpy since 2.30pm by 4pm she was crying with tiredness Tomorrow I've only got the 2 younest all day and nowhere I need to be so I'm going to toddlers in the morning then I'll come home feed them and put mindee to bed first then at 2pm i'll put dd down and hopefully by then she will be ready to sleep for at least an hour and mindee will be getting up by then anyway.

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Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 24/10/2007 19:26

If I can get her having an hour about 2ish then at least she can carry on napping at that time when schools start back - fingers crossed!!!!

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DottydotsofBloodOnTheFloor · 24/10/2007 19:28

We let ds's chill out in the afternoon at weekends and holidays - they're 5 and 3 so won't tolerate the idea of naps, but they lie on the settee watching TV for an hour or so. Makes tea time bearable...

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 25/10/2007 18:29

Think I might have to accept it's over! Tried again today..no luck! Even tried putting mindee in 1 room and dd in my room but she climbed out of the travel cot twice so that's not gonna work either, i tried putting the tv on in my room while she was in cot as a very last and desperate attempt to at least keep her in there and rest, no luck.....At least she hasn't been so miserable today dp is now just putting her to bed.

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Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 29/10/2007 13:55

On friday she fell asleep for 30mins in car on the way home on saturday while with her gp's she fell asleep for an hour in the car, yesterday they put her down for a nap and she went out like a light for over an hour and half, today I tried to put her down and she screamed, fearing she would wake mindee i took her with dummy and lay on my bed with tv on cuddling, after 10mins she wanted to play i tried to convince her to chill out but was having none of it and i was hungry so came down then she got mardy and started crying for nothing so i thought sod it i'll try putting her down before she gets really over tired - mindee was awake by 1pm so i got him up and put her down, she has now spent the past hour on and off crying, I KNOW she is tired and if i get her up she will spend all afternoon crying.

What shall I do? I rang dp for support and got told he is at work and busy and that I need to sort this out on my own..... fair enough he is at work but I am finding this very hard. It's not a case of just get her up then, if i do she spends all afternoon miserable/ crying constantly.

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slim22 · 29/10/2007 14:03

Ds stopped at 18 mths.
I still made him lie down and cuddle/read book/tell story after lunch. Quiet time essential I think.
We still do it at 3.5 when he comes back fom school.It may be 15mn, it may be 1 hour.

Very occasionnally he'll doze off. I think if you offer the opportunity without forcing the issue, it may work.

mustsleep · 29/10/2007 14:04

you might think this is awful but i put her in her room with the tv on low with noddy on etc she goes cos she wants to watch noddy as she isnt allowed to watch it downstairs

i lay her down and shut the gate

she will normally get up and bang around (we have laminate it sounds awful) and after about ten mins she will lay her self down and go to sleep (i sneak up and turn the tv off) she normally has about an hour to two hours sleep

Pitchounette · 29/10/2007 14:05

Message withdrawn

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 29/10/2007 14:15

The neighbours have just been round because its so unlike her to hear crying from my house, she was worried i'd fallen and was unconcious!! I said noI'm fine dd2 is just having a phase, either she screams now and drops off or screams later and has to wait until bedtime........I really do not know what to do.........she is quiet at the moment

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MaureenMLove · 29/10/2007 14:35

I really don't know what to suggest, LMG. I do tend to agree that you need to encourage quiet time rather than sleeptime though. I also don't think that laying on the sofa with the TV on is that wrong either!

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 29/10/2007 14:41

Unless she has dummy she won't sit still, even with dummy and tv lying on bed she wasnt having it. When she started crying anf tantruming I thought if I don't try putting her to sleep she will be like this all afternoon and it will only get worse. She's quiet at the moment.

Mindee went through about 6 weeks of not napping and was a nightmare at this age but it wasn't his choice to give it up, that was his mum saying he had to when she agreed his behaviour was unbearable without a nap she agreed to give it him back so I stuck it out and got him back into a routine so I know even if they don't sleep for a while they can go back to it BUT this is different in that it was her who just stopped, not me making her stop.

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MaureenMLove · 29/10/2007 14:45

Have you taken the dummy away then? Could she be persauded to just sit quietly on the sofa in front of a film?

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 29/10/2007 14:50

I've taken the dummy away except for sleep, so if i give her dummy on sofa isn't it going to be confusing for her when I take it off her when she gets down to play?

She doesnt have the attention span to watch a film shes only 2.1yrs

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MaureenMLove · 29/10/2007 14:57

Could be confusing, but it could also help her to understand that she has to sit still and be quiet when she has it.

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 29/10/2007 14:58

Just been up again and she looks like she might drop off!

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Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 29/10/2007 15:09

She's asleep. (only problem now is, what do i do tomorrow..........)

Can't do this tomorrow because I normally have 2 school runs to do...........Any ideas for tomorrow?

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bubblagirl · 29/10/2007 15:13

my ds was a yr when he no longer wanted to nap but if he wants to nap on the odd occasion i always make sure its before 1 and for an hr the most as night time routine is destroyed and maybe at least they can get get used to having shorter naps and you can keep cutting them down untill no longer needed

it takes few days of whining to get them used to it but they do i used to do quiet play at that time and distract him he soon got used to it

bloodsuckingLOONEY · 29/10/2007 15:16

I can only repeat what worked for my mindee who did this......put her down later. If I put her down after lunch she's a nightmare and doesn't sleep yet she also NEEDS her sleep. If I put her down after school run (3ish) then she goes straight to sleep. Actually, quite often she falls asleep on the way back from school and I just transfer her to bed. For me this is much better as I didn't see the point in fighting about napping earlier - it was never going to happen and was only stressing us out.

I know you can't put her down til 3.30ish as your school runs are later but I know having a later nap does NOT affect these mindees bedtime routine.

bloodsuckingLOONEY · 29/10/2007 15:18

Just seen post before mine - it obviously messes some people's routine so if you do later nap, you'll have to see how it affects bedtime of course.

Good luck

SqueeelyMeeely2 · 29/10/2007 15:28

I have 2.10yo twins, one naps at nursery, one doesn't - kinda proves every child is diff. They are at nursery all week - so at weekends, we throw routine out the window and if they wanna sleep they do, if not, they have to last til bedtime. I found taking mine out in the buggy just after lunch for a long stroll round my village gets them off, i then wheel them home and leave them outside the patio doors so i can see em (very claire verify isn't it!), they might have an hour or so.

I admit mine are older and i kinda trust their judgement now, they will only drop off if they NEED to sleep - I spot the signs at home, and having learned that they will no longer nap in their beds, we load up the buggy and head out.....if after half an hour of walking they are still awake, we go to the park - half an hour of running round, back in buggy, head home and they usually asleep by the time we get home.

I've just thought, we dropped naps at home before they were two as thats when we moved to beds and i've NEVER been able to get em to nap since, but they continued to nap at nursery til about 3 weeks ago, so i knew they were getting enough rest.

I have completely waffled and haven't helped you at all, but i guess my point is, you can't fight a toddler, but you can trick em - do u have a double buggy? while the weather is still fairly mild, just use that for now (as long as mindees mum isn't against the idea), u will be out and about, in the fresh air and kids will be getting sleep they need....

SpooKAYsamuels · 29/10/2007 15:51

My DS is just recently 3 and sometimes misses his nap, but if I am childminding baby mindee I put them both in the buggy, walk around the block and Voila! - both fast asleep! (Mindee will not settle to sleep at mine unless on the move outdoors in the buggy) If I'm not cm'ing I let DS stay awake and put him to bed early but that means he is cranky over tea time when I may have other kids to see to too.

Elibean · 29/10/2007 16:06

I persisted through the first messing about phase (around 2.1) and she settled down again....then around 2.5, she started dropping it and I let her. Had a few grumpy weeks at the old nap time, so we established a 'quiet time' in place of it...and that was, sadly, that

Elibean · 29/10/2007 16:06

And these days, at 3.10, dd will put herself to bed to look at books if truly knackered, and drop off to sleep. Which she is doing now, due to the clocks going back and an unearthly start this morning

Original poster

LoveMyGirls · 30/10/2007 08:17

Today is a new day, I'm hoping dd won't cry today, I can't phone dp for support today so i'd appreciate as much support from you all as poss to keep me sane

Dp doesn't agree with putting dd down at 3.30pm says it will disrupt her sleep at night i think its worth a try...... I don't really see how I can do this today......mindee will go down about 12, if i put her up when he drops off she may/ may not go to sleep - more than likely she wont and will end up waking him or i will end up getting her out to stop her waking him, he usually gets up about 2ish by which time its too late to put dd2 down as I have to leave the house by 2.50pm and if it takes her 30mins to an hour to settle ill have to get her up for school run. If i put her in my room in travel cot she climbs out (and its a right faff to move furniture)

If she goes without sleep all day she will get to 4pm and scream and scream.

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