2 year old naughtiness...

[surreygirl1987]

I've recently started taking my son to a little toddler sports group. It's a class led by an instructor and parents watch from the side. It's maybe his 4th time .. first two times he was a bit nervous and reticent but he's got his confidence now and enjoys it. He had a whale of a time today and was grinning the whole way through but after the first 10 minutes wasn't following any instructions, kept doing his own thing and being generally disruptive.

I know he's only two, and if anyone else posted this about a two year old I'd be a bit 🤨 and say it's totally normal 2 year old behaviour... But I can't help but compare him to all the other 2 years olds in his class - EVERY SINGLE ONE of them followed instructions perfectly and no issues. My boy needed an assistant to go and be with him (parents are asked not to). He's just being a normal toddler, right, and not necessarily going to grow up naughty and wild (I'm a school teacher and like to think I'm firm and consistent with him but he is quite a handful and definitely strong willed!). Thanks!

Completely normal. My DD1 was like one of the perfect toddlers but DD 2 was the one who was wandering about or trying to get inside the cupboard or leaping onto the stage during performances.

Oh good thanks!!! I was hoping someone would say that. At heart I think I know it but it's difficult not to compare with all the other very compliant little children!

I had a similar issue with mine when we did baby ballet. It really felt like she was the only one not listening to the instructor and using me as a climbing frame the whole time instead. It escalated eventually to me just walking out in tears half way through her last lesson I was very silly and really thought something was up with her. Looking back now I realise that a lot of the kids were older than her, maybe only by a few months but at this age that makes all the difference and I realised that it really didn't matter whether she wanted to do 'good feet naughty feet' a thousand times at age 2. I also realised that me being in the room was also a massive distraction for her. I think some kids just can't cope with the fact that their main caregiver is in there with them but there's this total stranger telling them what to do. For us lockdown happened shortly after anyway and I'm pleased to say she now loves going cheerleading and to lessons at a dance school. I'm not allowed in with her but I only hear good things after the lessons and she comes out absolutely buzzing. I think the extra few months maturity and not having mummy to 'play up to' are what really helped. Does your LO go to nursery? Mine didn't until age 2. I wonder if that also makes a difference to their ability to follow instruction etc too. I really wouldn't worry though. If he's enjoying it then send him anyway and possibly hide out of his view a bit. If he's not enjoying it don't stress yourselves out and just try again in a few months or try something else. There's nothing they'll learn in these classes that they can't learn in another few months or even years and some things just might not be what they're into so just don't stress and definitely don't assume it means something is wrong with him x

Also, are you SURE all the other kids are such little angels? I think you only really notice your own kid especially when it feels like they're 'showing you up' again looking back to our baby ballet there was a child the same age as mine who was literally constantly having to be asked to wait her turn which to be fair mine did very well and a child way older than mine who cried in fear and buried her head in mum's chest every time she was asked to do anything. Incidentally I now see the latter child at the dancing school and she's full of co fidence and happy to be left to do the lesson without mummy even there

Thanks for the reply. I think I might remember your thread about the ballet actually! Yea...He does go to nursery and mostly behaves well there... He does push boundaries sometimes but they're very good and firm and he's learned where the boundaries are.

But yes... Sadly the other children are so much better behaved comparatively! They literally do what they're told first time with no trouble. There's only around 5 of them in each class. You're right though that he is younger than them... It's a 2-3 class and he started the week after he turned 2 so I imagine the others are a bit older as they were already in the class. Now I think of it, one of the other boys is in the next group up at nursery. Even so though, I don't want my boy to always be the naughty one! I'm wondering if I should re enrol for next term or not... I'll try to go out of his view next time. I don't think anything is necessarily 'wrong' with him but I am concerned that being perceived 'the naughty one' now might follow through into school etc. Maybe I'm panicking and overthinking things ... It's a 2 year olds' sports class for goodness sake 🙈

Thanks again!

Yep it was probably me and now I realise how bloody ridiculous I was being honestly they change so much day to day at this age I don't think it by any means means he's not going to get on at school. I honestly wouldn't think much of it x

My son is like that and nearly 2. He doesn't really follow instructions and looks like the wild one. We recently went to the park with his little gang and who are similar aged and it's very hard not to compare when the other toddlers were so compliant and cooperative whereas my little one was in reigns tiring me out the whole time as he wanted to jump in the pond and stick his legs between the fences. Just before covid, I took him to a musical class and while all the other babies and toddlers were sitting around with the musical instruments and generally enjoying themselves, my little one was too busy smacking the flute against the radiators and was fascinated by the slide doors and cupboards.

Oh that's totally my son!! We should be on the same class :) but they'll turn out okay, right? 🙂

@surreygirl1987 hehe :)))) I'm sure they'll be fine, I've had so many worries but apparently my DH was like that and he is totally fine apart from having ants in his pants and always on the go. I've heard from a few people that these types of toddlers turn out to be intelligent (from our doctor, dentist, HV, Mil and other older women) as they are super curious although my lo does sometimes do things that would surprise you and make you think his going to be a genius and then the next second he eats his food from his shoes or I'll catch him licking the telly or something that I never see other kids age do and start worrying again 🤷‍♀️