Autism/Language Delay in my 19 month old.

[Tweedy212]

Sorry, i realise there are many posts like this one but today, i've broken down with worry and just looking for an insight and/or any advice/reassurance etc.

My boy turned 19 months yesterday and ive had concerns for ASD ever since he stopped babbling at around 15 months. I am struggling watching him fall behind his peers-

• he has no words. He coughs when he needs/wants your attention or even if he just wants to chat for example at the dinner table he will cough away at us, we will talk back and he will respond with more coughing.

-He doesn't point to things he needs- he will reach for things or stand and stare at it while whining. He will sometimes point to things in books or point to our shoes when we have them on etc but when outside he doesn't point to anything of interest.

• He can follow very basic instructions- e.g go and get your shoes.
• He follows my point only within close range or within the activity we are doing- if i was to point to something behind him he wouldn't turn around to look. Nor does he wave bye bye, although seems to know what it means.
• He has decent eye contact and is very cuddly. He understands emotions and enjoys making us laugh. Or, like today, when i was crying with worry he came up and gave me a cuddle.
• He is fine in big groups although doesn't play with children his age. Responds well to older kids. He watches children his age but generally like to just run around himself.
• He doesn't do any form of role play/imaginative play.
• Is un-phased with changes in routine.
• Sleeps well
• He does look for reactions when he does things new things- responds well to praise. Or if he is in a strange environment, does make sure to look for me every so often.
• Responds to his name 80% of the time. Although when he is playing it can be incredibly hard to get his attention.

These are just some observations i've made. I'm struggling to determine if i'm expecting too much from him and he will get there in his own time or if i should be concerned. I have raised concerns with the HV who then referred us to SLT but i'm not sure if there's more i should be doing. I feel like i can't enjoy his toddler years because of the worry.

Thanks for reading, i know it's long!

My own DS was like this apart from the pointing which came in when he was well into his 16 months. He is 21 months now and only a few times he has ever requested anything from me by pointing or showing an aeroplane in the sky or a dog walking by, only a few times. He is more interested in being active such as climbing, trying to jump and always on the go. I'm replying to your post hoping it will boost it and someone more knowledge could come along and give you better advice. I have my doubts, although my gut says he is ok so I'm awfully sorry as I'm not trying to hijack your post by posting my own concern. I also saw the HV last month and she told me she had no concerns and they often unravel all at once, although I have another appointment as soon as he turns 2. Good luck x

Thank you GGioia. Any response is appreciated, it's nice to hear other's experiences and concerns. Helps to know that we're in the same boat at times. My DS is the same in terms of being active, he is always so busy sometimes he just doesn't stop to look at what's going on around him.

My son is almost 2 and we're in a similar situation. We got concerned at 18 months due to a number of factors, didn't understand an awful lot, appeared to be somewhat deaf, didn't point, spent a lot of time playing in his own little world.

We called our HV who asked us to speak to speech and language and referred us for a hearing test. The hearing test was conducted the other month and nothing was wrong. They said he was a bright little boy who understood everything they said. We spoke breify to speech and language and they gave us some games to play with him. Mostly it involved us copying what he done e.g babble what he babbles, respond to what he's interested in eg if he's playing with a car going down a slide then try to encourage him to take turns. Try rolling a ball back and forward between the two of you. They didn't think a referral was required at that time. We did this often and he's changed quite a bit.

He still doesn't have a whole range of words but frequently uses ta, up, mumma, something a ga ga ga (obviously banana.... 😅), he points infrequently but does now point, he no longer appears deaf at times, he understands a lot more and will get thing you ask for that he knows.

So far my unprofessional diagnosis is he's just too interested in running around at 100mph and learning about everything else and speech isn't a requirement really for him yet. We do see more progress and quicker now than before so we're 100 times less worried as Google has a lot of interesting things to say.

Your son has many positives, specially the social referencing - the only real concern at this age would be the lack of distal pointing to request/show interests - while its beginning to get a little late (its considered late after 18M) I have known of cases of toddlers starting to distal point at 20M and develop totally normal.

My son is now 18 and has multi disciplinary special needs which includes being on the autism spectrum. We didn't find out util he was 5, and officially diagnosed at 8. He is a lot like a 6ft 5 year old. Loves Little Einsteins, Tweenies and Phineus and Ferb. He can also speak many complex languages, self taught. He is loving, funny, and is learning to be more empathetic. I would not change him for the world. Whilst you see a potential problem, your child is just who they are. In all likelihood your DS will be neuro typical. If he is a little different he will still be your son. Stop worrying and just show him you love him.

I have the same concern as yours... and 1 post in here is right thay google have much to say about everything... it seems like they are more interested in some areas like running, watching than learning to talk, although my 18month son babble much now than before but still he knows only few words and yes it freak the s* out of me too... he also doesnt seem to be interested in pointing, wave bye or hi but he does it when he wants it..

To be honest i think google makes it worse for us parent, all things you search will be connected to ASD which i think is awful.

Hi how’s your darling son ? ☺️

Hello Vittoria! My son is well. An amazing, healthy 5 year old now- how time flies. He did get an autism diagnosis at 3 years old however has came on leaps ans bounds since this post.

He didnt talk until he was 3 and it was hard but it was as if overnight he started talking. He can now have a full blown conversation with you, asks questions and answers questions- he is so curious. He is above average in numeracy and literacy. He did eventually start to point and wave although even now he waves backwards and it the cutest thing.

He struggles to pick up on social ques still however he is getting there and becoming more confident. Still full of energy, he loves to be outside in his scooter and climbing. His imagination also developed amazingly over the last couple of years.

He of course has his struggles and we work through them as best we can at the time but in general he takes a lot in stride.

It has been a whirwind few years. Lots of emotions and struggles for us all but i absolutely would not change him for the world.

Hi smoky how’s your son now ? X any updates

How’s your son now ? X when did the pointing come on if you don’t mind me asking ☺️

@vittoria123
I don't think he ever really learned to point at things, especially not in the way my younger son did. My son is now almost 6 and in school. He's under speech and language and has been seen by the pediatrician over a query on ASD but they're on the fence.

Either way he's doing really well, can ride a bike, loves Pokémon enjoys swimming but isn't a social bunny.

Hi 👋 many thanks for your reply . I can find comfort in your words . My dd ( 18 months ) is going through the same ☺️ . She rarely points ( a few times a day ) but she reaches for what she wants or look at me to help her ( doesn’t point to say what she wants . Although she has a vocabulary of 100 words I do worry a lot . Other than the pointing , she eats and sleep really well , always hold my hand when out and about ( never wander off ) , follows instructions and always engaging with us . Forgive me for asking but has your lovely son encountered any struggles so far ? Is he what doctors would consider high functioning? Please don’t feel obligated to answer back . I am just thankful for your reply ☺️