How to stop a one year old from whining????

[artichokes]

Is it possible.

DD is 14 months and only has a few real words. She is mainly very happy and sweet However, when she wants something she points at it and in a very high pitched screech says "eeehhhhhh". When she wants me to read a book she hands it to be and repeats the shriek. Its the same when the book is over and she is sad. Or when she just wants attention. Or doesn't like lunch. Or is tired.... In fact its all the time. I hear "eeeehhhhhh" about 100 times a day.

It is doing me head in. No other baby of my acquaintance makes these noises as much. Our nanny says we are under the thumb and should stop responding to it BUT I can't ignore it, then it will carry on, and to be fair it is the only way she can communicate at the moment. I have tried saying "don't make that noise" but I think she is too young to understand.

Any tips?

My 15 month's old varies a little - she points at everything and says 'air' (she does have a few words as well though). Atm she seems to almost point non-stop. I kind of agree with your nanny. I don't always respond if i am doing something else (although try to help as much as I can). I think she knows we think it's cute and uses it as a way of getting attention as quite often she is not pointing to anything in particular!

The thing is when I ignore it she just repeats it again and again and again, getting louder and more high pitched each time.

Maybe I will try ignoring it consistently for one day and see if by the end of the day it is getting better. I guess there is no magic trick.

Artichokes, I don't think you can train something like this out of a baby or even try.

That is how your dd communicates and she will eventually learn better ways of getting her point across, especially once her speech starts kicking in.

By all means try ignoring, but I personally would not persist if it did not get better. Because to ignore your dd on a longer basis would be to tell her that she is not important (affect her self-esteem) and stifle her need to communicate (which is really important for her development, esp re: speech).

FWIW, I don't agree with your nanny. Your dd is what she is, she should be respected as an individual. Words like "under the thumb" or "manipulative" or "she has got you where she wants you" used in the context of babies make me .

BTW, my ds (13 months) screeches at the top of his voice when frustrated. And points at everything that he is not allowed to touch and goes hysterical if he is not able to play with it. So I know what you mean about doing your head in! This too shall pass ...

She is just communicating with you. Say the word of the object she wants clearly to her each time to help her associate names with objects.

Otherwise, this is just very normal. I'm pretty sure that it is more frustrating for her, being unable to say the words to adults who have a somewhat irritated face on them, than it is for you to listen to her squeal each time.

I might also point out that this is just the tip of the iceberg . They actually do whine proper when they get to about 4 years old and it continues right up until adult hood. You might want to get used to it already!

!!!

haha Yvaine, you are so right about getting used to whining!

Thanks guys. I am glad that not everyone agrees with the nanny that we are under the thumb blueshoes - I agree that is a horrible phase to use in relation to a baby. It is like saying "clingy" to describe a child who is attached to their mum). The reason we have been responding thus far is because of a gut instinct that ignoring attempts at communication, however irritating, would be cruel.

While I hate to conceed that I have another 14+ years of this I suppose that is true... we are trying for number two right now so I really better just get used to it.

I think there's a fine balance between attending to your babies innate curiosity about life and his/her needs and wants AND attending to your own concerns as well. I am not always at my baby's beck and call. Perhaps that's what your nanny was trying to say. I find that my dd is not that whiney, or perhaps it doesn't bother me that much! i actually think the pointing/'air' thing is pretty cute and an inroad into proper speech.

This is oh so annoying but oh so normal! I am just trying to get ds (2.4) to talk more rather than reverting to the point and 'eeeeh' strategy.

It is very annoying and sounds very spoilt (although I don't think it is actually) but it will get better when she can talk more.