Help! 13 month old day time nap trouble.......

[snotonmyshoulder]

I'm really struggling to know how best to get my 13 month old off for his day time nap. He's down to one nap a day now and he used to be really good at going off. He would show obvious tired signs and around the same time each day and with just a bit of gentle rocking in arms would get him realy dozy and he'd go down with minimum of fuss.

Trouble is he's starting to resist being put down. I think it's related to him generally going longer through the day before he needs his nap. However he ends up getting over tired and doesn't want to be held or be put down. I've tried twice to get him off the usual way but ended up just now having to leave him in his cot as he cries whatever I try. He's cried for about 5-10 mins before giving in and gone off to sleep. But I feel really bad for leaving him. Anyone going through anything similar? Any tips to help us through this stage would be really helpful.

He will get into the swing of it, once the transition is over.
When DD is teething, things get messed up but otherwise, she goes to bed on a full stomach straight after lunch. I don't rock her off -1. because I never have and 2. because she'd try and stay in my arms instead of going in the cot.

What time do you put him down now? He might need to go earlier now he's down to one nap. When dd was 13 months, I think she got up at 7am and napped at about 11.30/45 for up to 2hrs.

I think a 5-10 minute cry is probably upsetting for you, but if it is followed by sleep he is crying because he is tired. Objectively, better a 5-10 minute cry than a miserable afternoon because no sleep. (Well thats what I tell myself!) DD is 12 months and her naps are also a bit of a mess at the moment. However, I seem to remember that once DS could comfortably take one nap it was much easier. (That is until his nap started to interfere with bed time, but that is another story, and about a year later).

Thanks for your replies. Puffling, DS used to be clockwork at getting up around 7ish, and would nap around 11 for an hour, and then have another in the afternoon. He's now napping for longer in his morning nap and will happily go through the afternoon without.

It's tough because my work has been different this week, and he's probably a bit confused. But there's nothing I can do about the change, I've had to work different hours. But I think he's also having a growing spurt and is sleeping later in the morning until about 7.30 - 8 and then not being sleepy until about 11.30 -12. Occassionally he will go through til after lunch, but I still have trouble getting him off. At night time he is fairly easy, he'll be dozy in arms, after his bath and go down with little fuss.

MPlatypus, I think you are right, he is crying because he is tired. I'd love to get him back into a regular nap time but I guess I just don't know at the moment, when the best time is.

Crying for 5-10mins seems like no time at all. Its awful to hear it but alot of them do. My 11 month DD has always cried for at least that long before going to sleep - she does it in the car, cot, pushchair. We have just moved to one nap and she sometimes resists - we cried/mumbled for 30mins today, I had to go back in. She was tired but couldn't settle. I am trying to be as consistent as possible for a month - so she has lunch 11.45ish then down to sleep at 12.30ish each day. Its a nightmare as I can't go out over lunch but she has now been asleep 1.5hours so it must be working! I'm not one for rigid routines but she is in a much better mood if she knows what is going to happen, more so it seems as she gets older. After a week of this strict one nap day she is visibly expecting to go to bed.

Thanks for your post tapster, I unusually had to leave DS to cry a bit last night too but today has been easier and tonight, text-book style!

I can't wait until he can tell me what's going on for him. Some days things are just so obvious and easy, then others like yesterday it just seems like nothing will work! Not had to use cc for ages, and really hoped not to have to again, but yes, in hindsight, 5-10 mins is a drop in the ocean.

He'll settle eventually I'm sure, into having a nap either before lunch or after but I just wish it'd become clear which way's best soon! Not one for rigid routine either but I'm a lot less grumpy too, when I know roughly what to expect!

I'm going to try putting him down between 11/30 - 12 and then have a late lunch when he wakes

DD was quite similar(refused to go to sleep on her own) and it ended up with me holding her tight in my arms to stop her from wriggling and rocking frantically just so I could get her to sleep. I ended up doing this until she was 2 yrs old. I wouldnt recommend it.

With DS he always gets put down awake for his sleeps.
Your DS is crying because he is overtired and going to sleep on his own is not normal for him as he is used to being held by you. He will get used to it in a few days and be happier going down for a nap.

Thanks kbaby though perhaps I've not been very clear. I only hold him until he is dozy, I then tell him quietly that it's time to go down for a sleep and he's then ususally happy to be put down, sometimes he's ready straight away, before much of a cuddle and leans towards his cot to go straight down. At least this is what happens at night time, so I think he is generally used to falling asleep by himself. Only occassionaly is he so tired after his bath that he's pretty much asleep when he's put down.

Having made a plan of action yesterday to keep putting down at the same time for day time nap, all has changed as he woke early at 6.30 this morning, no apparent reason. Thus he's been much more tired this morning and I've just put him down now for a sleep as he started to get cranky. But I've stuck with gently telling him what's happenning and he's only cried for a short while, and with much less of a heartrending protest, so I think I'm getting there.

It would be good to hear from anyone with ideas about how to progress with getting him napping regularly with a no cry solution but I'm gradually becoming a believer again that a few tears aren't necessarily the worst thing in the world. It would be good to get him in a routine but I'm not sure he would have suffered more to keep him going for another hour or so. Think I just have to grit my teeth and just keep believing that a new routine will develop when his body clock has settled into one nap. Oh cripes he's just woken!!