Almost 4 year old impossible to play with

[Squiggleness]

I have been a Stay at Home mum for many years. With my eldest, a girl, I managed to play with her a teach her some basics before she started school. She would enjoy sitting to do an activity with me. My son on the other hand rejects any advances I make to do something together. He just whines for food or the tv, and if I do manage to find an activity he wants to do, he ruins it within minutes. I'm struggling to find our time together enjoyable, and feeling like a bad parent despite my efforts to interact with him.
I don't know what I'm looking for really, advice or stories of similar children who became less obstructive. I must say here that my son is also a funny, clever and kind boy when he wants to be.

Well, doing an activity and teaching basics is very different than playing.
Maybe he doesn't find the type of things you want to do enjoyable.

What about playing with cars or dinosaurs? Building something and then destroying it?

If the TV starts to take an excessive space in his life - he is almost 4 and it is the only thing he seems to enjoy - remove the plug and say it is broken for a week.

Incorporate the learning into play..e.g. have some numbers (like the fridge magnet ones) and diggers or cars, and move them to match the same number youve written down. Not sure that makes sense.. but basically make it physical.

This week I saw an idea where you write numbers on those air filled packaging things, and shouted out a number then DS had to go and jump and pop it. He thought it was wonderful.

5 minute mum.. blogger.. has some great ideas of making these learning things into fun games, with fairly simple set ups.

DS will now say to me, mummy can we do a game.