Separation Anxiety - Help!

[xxxbabyno1]

My nearly 11 month old son is having a terrible time with separation anxiety.

I'm a single mum and it's really starting to take its toll on me too.

I have to carry him around the house with me as he screams and gets so upset if I leave the room without him. His sleep his really badly impacted as he wakes up looking for me several times a night.
This has been going on for months now and I know it's normal to an extent but I feel like it's getting worse.

It's worth mentioning he goes into nursery and to his grandparents fine. I think it's more when he knows I'm there. I feel terrible cos I feel like he's just constantly upset. Even sitting on the sofa he HAS to be up with me.

Is this normal and can anyone tell me when he will feel a little safer playing on his own or be able to settle himself in the night without getting upset?

Thanks! X

Following as we've got the exact same problem!

We are going through this too!

I’m taking the approach of just going with it, like everything else it will pass.

During the day, if I can’t take the wailing/crawling around my feet, I pop him in the carrier. He’s happy and I’m given a break from the moaning - although it is tough on my back now that he’s so big! But at least I can prep dinner etc without being screamed at.

At night, we have started to co-sleep. Baby has a sidecar cot (which I love) but even that isn’t enough now for him, so we co sleep and once he’s off I just roll him in. And if he wakes, j don’t actually have to get up, he just crawls back in.

Evenings are a bit harder as I put him in the cot and go downstairs - normally he wouldn’t need me at all during this time but now, like you say, I see him on the monitor looking for me. So no answer to that one I’m afraid as I just pop in and soothe him back off, which isn’t ideal every 30 mins!!!

@Inthesky42 @Eggcellent29

It's really hard isn't it. I feel like I've tried everything. I know in a few months I'll be wanting him to be more clingy when he's off being independent but the lack of sleep is really hard.

I have had to start co sleeping too as it's too much. He goes into his own bed at night then I move him through when he wakes up crying (which I worry might be making the full situation worse)

I've tried the 'pat & shush' technique where I keep going in with little interaction but it seems to make him worse when he sees me. I've tried the 'pick up put down' technique but again just wakes him up and wants me more. I've tried feeding him a little extra before bed incase he's waking up hungry. I'm now trying white noise for the first time tonight due to the fireworks so we shall see.

During the day he is the same @Eggcellent29 if he's in his high chair or pram I will manage to get a few things done but after a while it's arms in the air shouting mum mum mum.

It is a normal phase I know, I have done so much research but it's so draining for both of us.