Moving ds from a cot to a bed (at approx 19 months) - advice and top tips wanted.

[MuffinMclay]

I need to move ds1 out of his cot and into a bed before ds2 arrives. Ds2 is scheduled for early Feb. I've been told that as a high risk pregnancy I should be prepared to have a cs any time from 34 weeks (Christmas time). I want ds to get used to the whole bed concept in plenty of time, so am planing to move him in late Nov/early Dec.

2 things baffle me:

1. Should I keep him in his grobag when he moves to the bed, or change to pillows, duvets etc. Grobags might be more familiar and comforting, but he'll trip up if (when!) he tries to climb out of bed.

2. How on earth do you get them to stay in bed once you put them there (night time and early mornings)?

He has never wanted to come in bed with us (protests and climbs straight out if I try that to get a few minutes more in bed in the morning), so the whole idea of duvets will be new to him.

hi

we were going to wait til ds2 was born before takin ds1's cotbed sides off, btu he ahd other ideas at about 23mo and realised he could tip over the cotbed sides

we ditched the grobags at the same time - just not safe if there is a chance they can get up and around, imo

got a pillow but didn't use it for a while - in fact he's 2.5 now and has only had a thin one for a month or so

we got a coverlet for warm noghts and a duvet for colder ones

we also used (still do) a bedguard as he fell out and would get upset - we wanted to keep the trasnition as smooth as poss

we wer lucky in that our door handles are too high for ds1 to reach btu you may want to consider a stairgate

wierdly, he rarely gets out of bed - he calls for us in the morning

ps maybe hang on before introducin a duvet? you could just dress him warmly (vest, pjs and socks?) for a while

ds1 often kicks his copvers off so we use socks on cold nights

He can reach and open the door handles already, unfortunately.

Do people put stairgates across bedroom doors, or is that considered cruel?

My absolutely honest opinion is that if he's happy in a cot don't do it yet, buy/borrow/steal another one for your new arrival and leave moving into a bed until he's at least 2. Ikea do small and inexpensive cots that would fit most babies until 18 months old.

My friends moved her son out at 18 months ish, now he doesn't sleep in the day, won't go to bed, it's been a nightmare and she now says she wishes she'd listened to me and not rushed into doing it!

It is so hard to know what to do! SIL moved all her dcs at 12 months (to make way for the next one) and says I've left it late.

i think your reasons for moving him (in your op) are sensible ones

unless you want to have 2 cots then a move at this age is reasonable

but don't feel bullied in to it - i ahve a friend whose dd is still in her cotbed at nearly 3 yo

stairgate at his bedroom door is perfectly sensible - it's for his own safety

I can see your SIL point of view that perhaps 12 months ish is a window of opportunity but at 19 months they're going through that independence stage! My niece had a bed and kept putting herself back in her cot at 3.5 years but was fine in the end!

I've always moved mine around 2.5 years without any problem and firmly after the new arrival is old news!

This was a nightmare with our son. We had to move him to a bed at 16 months as he was alternately shaking his cot to destruction or vaulting out of it (he could reach his toes up high enough to get his foot over the side, and hoist the rest of him up and and over). Either way, we were stuffed as regards keeping him away from our bed at night. He just turned up in our bed every night for years. So not much useful advice I'm afraid... He stopped coming into our bed at night at around the age of 6. I miss them now. Was reminded of this phase two nights when daughter number 2, now aged 10, and who has not slept in or visited our bed for years, turned up after a nightmare and hogged the quilt all night. Took me right back. Such nostalgia...

Anyway, good luck with the transition.

My 18mth old is in a bed. She LOVES it (see other posts I have written about it). She does get out (but that was the point, so she could feel a bit more in control). We always went to her if she cried so it's no different for us. And we figure you have to do the bed thing at some point so why not now?

She stays in bed (and goes and gets herself to bed) if she is tired but if she is not then she gets out - doesn't see the logic in being in bed if she isn't going to sleep I guess! But she will easily go back to bed and tbh you just keep consistent I think.

We have a pillow and duvet - used a pillow and blanket for a while in cot and we co-slept for a while too. She had no probs with transition - we played lots of bed games and made it an exciting new phase. Honestly, she adores bed bed bed and started self-settling too. She is sooooo much more independent. It really works for us (but then she has never had any bad associations with sleep).

Having said that, you don't have to put him in a bed. You could try it later. Ikea do great cots that become 3 sided beds.

We put dd in a bed at 18 months.

We had a bed guard and just a low tog duvet.
First two nights she didnt get out, we were smug parents.

Next two nights were nights of HELL

fifth night we put a stairgate on the door.
Works a treat, she sometimes gets out and plays quietly. But gets back into bed herself. And she can do the same in the morning.

She is fine and loves her bed. First month or so we would occasionally find her asleep on the floor. but she soon worked out where was more comftable.

Good Luck

Think I will go with the bed idea, rather than getting another cot. Partly, I'd rather deal with any problems before ds2 comes along and I am sleep deprived and grumpy. Also seems such a waste to buy another cot, even a cheap one, as I am not going to have any more dcs after this. I can always put him back into a cot, and get hold of a 2nd one if it is a disaster.

I suspect he'll be throwing himself out of the cot soon anyway.

Thanks for all the advice.