I've just been called a bitch

[dopaminedepleted]

Nagging husband to do some gardening properly. He goes out there half does stuff and he got annoyed and called me a bitch. Me nagging children to get outside and off screens. Cue shouting. Finally get outside and son 9 calls me a bitch.

I feel completely drained and fed up and like why the fuck do I bother with anything for them when I get treated so disrespectfully.

How would you deal with this? Be kind please.

Do your dc hear him speaking to you like that?

Well they just did. He's never called me one before.

Why are you nagging? Why can't you do the gardening?

Yes it is a problem that your DH speaks to you this way, and in front of the children. But there is often only so much any one person can take before they snap at you.

But i suspect there might be a back story here.... It's more than this one incident isn't it

What an odd assumption to make?

OP, does your DH make a habit of speaking disrespectfully to you in front of the children?

It’s clear that they are seeing this and thinking it’s an okay way to talk to you, so it needs to be nipped in the bud. Can you have a calm conversation with your DH about it once the dust has settled? x

Nope sorry I totally disagree with pp. Neither one of you should be talking disrespectfully to each other and your son is a prime example of why. He is learning how to negotiate relationships primarily from you both and he’s therefore learning that this is an acceptable way to treat women (and indeed men) and if you have daughters they are learning that this is how a man will treat them. You need to tell your husband that he needs to watch what he says and that you expect him to tell your son that he was in the wrong and that he might’ve been angry but this is absolutely not the way to talk to someone. I think it’s irrelevant how much you were nagging. You need to be talking AWAY from your children about how it makes him feel if you pressurise him and how you feel if you have to pressurise him before he’ll actually get off his arse and do something and decide between you how big an issue it actually is. You shouldn’t be taking that crap from him though. Your kids are watching clearly...