Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Feeling stressed

7 replies

Proudmumofboy · 28/09/2020 10:31

Recently we moved from a 1 bedroom flat to a shared house.We are a couple and a 3 years young will call him A. We share with another family of 3 couple and a 9 years old... will call him D .... When we arrived all was well but after a few days of living here D started telling off my child copying me and that resulted in A starting to feel stressed and started having tantrums when D was trying to approach him. Because of the age difference and they don't have any siblings they haven't really connected properly.... But the worst bit is that I've seen D once when A stretched for a biscuit pushing the bag away so A couldn't reach for it... This one got upset and the second I said he could have one I wanted to take the biscuit bag an D grabbed just before me... So A got even more upset thinking that he s going to take it away and started a big tantrum.
D' mum told me that I should tell him off that she doesn't care.... But just by saying that it gives me the impression that she doesn't give a flow and it doesn't feel right for me to do that. More she is expecting another one so I m assuming it's in her interest to start teaching the older one how to behave with a baby or a toddler.
A is got to the point where as soon as D is getting closer to him starts to cry and has a melt down... Just thinking what I could do.... I don't want to punish A for misbehaving and having a tantrum but if he's been bullied and the other one's mum hasn't noticed what happened... By the time we turn around D looks like he's trying to help... Or lately what he does is telling him that he cannot do that or the other one.... In the garden wich is supposed to be for playing... And these a 3 and half years... They need to explore and talked and told everything.... I told D few times that he needs to talk to A but he's not keen in listening.... I started follow A thru the garden when D comes out and now what he does is just telling him that he can't do something and send him to me... I feel really bad and I don't want my son to be around such caracter.... I think we need to move on our own again...but with the things being the way they are will need some time... Any thoughts?

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
FortunesFave · 28/09/2020 11:30

It sounds very uncomfortable....your little boy is very small and has had to adjust to an unusual way of living.

What made you move in with another couple? It seems an odd thing to do. I would try to move out as soon as possible.

Proudmumofboy · 28/09/2020 11:57

My DH is self-employed and I just got off my furlough... We have no steady income at the mom so we said we could save some money in doing so... We moved from London to Birmingham (the couple are living in a 4 bedroom house wich should be enough for all but looks like it's not. We were paying over 1000 pounds in London so we had to cut it drastically.... Although beign here and paying to them.... 500 monthly just realised that I could get a one bedroom flat on ourselves and apply for Universal.... Wich I can't a the mom because she is the one who has some benefits so I'm off the list for this property....

OP posts:
Proudmumofboy · 28/09/2020 12:01

That's my thinking... Because of the stress... and the other one... Looks like she like to control everything and everyone s life's.... I really didn't needed a life organizez..... Thank you.. On the hunt for a 1 bedroom..and honestly quite disappointed because I really thought would get us well since we know each other since school.... People are really different when at home... That s for sure

OP posts:
FortunesFave · 28/09/2020 12:02

Yes you can...you are a separate household. Just because you live with this other family does not mean you cannot claim benefits. who told you that?

Proudmumofboy · 28/09/2020 12:54

Really don't remember I think someone told me long ago that if you live with someone who already has benefits on the property then you can't claim..... It might be that's just for housing benefits.... I need to look into it properly

OP posts:
Proudmumofboy · 28/09/2020 12:56

We did had it on the flat we lived before... Housing benefit and council tax Reduction... But closed them down because of the move out. Will be looking into it asap

OP posts:
FortunesFave · 28/09/2020 13:56

You will be entitled to benefits...if you're lodging, you should still receive some housing benefits. Definitely as you are separate families!

New posts on this thread. Refresh page