Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

How on earth can I get dd's hair combed without it turning into a battle and both of us getting cross???

46 replies

lilybubble · 07/10/2007 20:09

Dd is 4 and since the age of about 18 months has hated her hair being touched. She has long hair, and doesn't like it being brushed, combed, washed, tied back, and quite often doesn't even like it being touched. She has not consistently disliked this, we have had small bursts of success but they are always extremely short-lived. I've always thought it's a phase and she'll grow out of it, but she really isn't showing any signs of that!

With her due to start school in Jan, I really want to try to move forward with this. Her hair has a massive knot in it at the back, and she literally screams and hits the roof if I touch it at all.

Does anyone have any advice as to how to deal with this? I am tired of battling and just want her to have beautiful hair

Thanks x

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

PeachesMcScream · 07/10/2007 22:56

So glad I've got a boy. Why do we faff around with girls having long hair?

stealthsquiggle · 07/10/2007 23:07

Aussie hair products "hair insurance". Smells nice, works like a dream.

hana · 07/10/2007 23:11

my 6 year old sleeps in whatever hairstyle she had that day (2 pony tails, 1 pony tail, braids, etc etc) makes it so much easier the next morning to sort out and neaten for school

I know it's time to get it cut when there she starts whining and I lose it. (currently time for a cut!)

dd2 has a sweet little bob, but dd1 doesn't want 'boy hair' like her little sister her words.....

hollyhobbie · 08/10/2007 08:23

I found the solution is routine (Though my DD is only 2.6). we used to wash her hair really rarely because she hated it and it was such a performance. But because it was only done rarely she wasn't used to it so that made it a real performance.
When we found a tick in her head that had obviously been there for a couple of days we realised we had to change our ways. Now EVERY SUNDAY is hairwash day and she has her hair brushed every morning. She knows it's going to happen whether she wants it to or not, so she's kind of come to accept it.
Also cutting her hair really helped.

lucyellensmum · 08/10/2007 08:43

haven't read all the posts, but i have the same problem with dd (2.2) She has always had long hair (from birth!!!) and it is long, fine and CURLY!! Well it is curly underneath and has a long straighish bit at the top which just sits over the rest of her lovely curls looking scruffy, it matts, really looks like a dreadlock sometimes. She really cries when i try to brush her hair, i don't blame her, it looks like it really hurts bless her. Ive tried conditioner and detangler nothing really helps. Sometimes she will go for ages without me brushing her hair as i dont think it worth the tears and upset - trouble is, i couldnt bring myself to cut it, its such lovely hair, all ringlets and she is just gorgeous, but i do notice some dirty looks at M&T sometimes when her hair is scrunched roughly into a hair band and plonked on top of her head - i look like such a bad mother !!

So, any offers for curly, fine, matty hair?

wildpatch · 08/10/2007 08:47

scissors

lucyellensmum · 08/10/2007 08:48

eeewww ewwwww ewwww ewwwww yuuuuuck about the tick!! i had one in my back once, i FREAKED out!! i mean, did you know, those fuckers are actually arachnids (yeah spiders!!)

But these things get big really quickly actually so don't beat yourself up over it, she probably picked it up in the garden or something - so to me, the tick suggests a healthy outdoorsy sort of life

My cat once had 72 ticks in her, she nearly died, she had disappeared and came back in a terrible state, we think she had been down a rabbit hole, unpleasant in the extereme, we had to anaethetise her to remove them. She wasnt aneamic but almost.

Sorry, totally of subject, but its the "T" word, makes me shudder. But certainly doesnt suggest bad parenting or poor, um, husbandry

Frizombie · 08/10/2007 08:51

Cut it, dd1 here has a 'dora' cut, as she hates having her hair brushed, so I've explained its staying short until she likes it. We also do the anti tangle spray on her (bob'd) short hair and she helps with that, still whinges if we do get a lug though

nappyaddict · 08/10/2007 08:52

have you tried using lots of conditioner and combing it when it is wet?

or keep it in a plait/bun so it doesn't get knotty.

also getting her to do a bit herself might help?

does she play with dolls? could you get her to comb their hair while you comb hers?

GooseyLoosey · 08/10/2007 08:53

Ultimatum - brush it or cut it?

dd 3 has short hair and must say that although she is not nuts about having it brushed, becuase it is fairly short, it doesn't bother her. She loves fairies and such like and we tell her that all fairies brush their hair every day!

Anna8888 · 08/10/2007 09:07

My daughter (2.11) has really long fine, straight hair. She has only been to the hairdresser three times in her life, to have the ends neatened up. I wash it every day in the bath and use masses of conditioner and de-tangle it with my fingers, and then run a comb through it and let it dry naturally. She hardly ever has a tangle and wears it loose, except for school when she has a pony tail.

forsale · 08/10/2007 11:09

definitely use a leave in conditioner. DD was like this when she was little and this game worked for us:

When brushing dds hair she could purr like a cat when it wasnt hurting her (or whatever her fave animal was). When I hurt her by tugging on a knot she barked like a dog You feel a real idiot doing it but not as much as she will when she grows up a bit and you remind her of the game!

Mercy · 08/10/2007 11:25

For really bad knots, put some oil in the hair and comb it through slowly, leave for a bit and then wash it out.

Also good for thick dry hair.

ivykaty44 · 08/10/2007 11:34

Olive oil - gets ride of the knots, leaves the hair in beautiful condition and the plus is it gets shot of nits aswell.

Put the olive oil on before you wash the hair and leae for a while then just shampoo as over the side of the bath with a flanel over your dd's face. It really isn't messy (I thought it would be messy and difficult to get the oil out of the hair - it isn't at all)

It works as it leaves the hair in really good condition with all the cuticles lying flat.

Get a wide tooth comb and comb the hair afterwards. Never ever brush the hair when it is wet.

ChantillyLace · 08/10/2007 20:51

Don't cut it!! DD3 has long, long hair with curls at the end and it's gorgeous! It does get very tangled (de-tangling spray doesn't work) so she keeps it in plaits at night (think someone suggested that) and I use loads of conditioner, comb it through with conditioner on it then rinse and comb through. Never brush wet hair! It stretches it, always use a wide-tooth comb and start at ends upwards. If her hair is really bad and tangled I do half then tie it out of the way and give her a break for 5 mins then we sit in front of telly again and finish it off.

Mason Pearson brush used every day is the only way to go! For us anyway

Raggydoll · 09/10/2007 11:43

advice on this thread is great. my dd is 2 and too young for me to reason with. I will be trying:

Olive oil once a week
Wide tooth comb
I have a natural bristle brush - is it worth buying one of the branded ones.Actually just checked and mine is 'kent'.
Homemade detangle spray

nappyaddict · 09/10/2007 17:19

mason and pearson hairbrushes are the best.

JaneLumley · 09/10/2007 18:43

My dd has hair down to her knees - she's 7. I suggest:
A Mason Pearson hairbrush. Spend the money you're saving on haircuts. The small size ones are best ofr children.
NEVER use shampoo. Neither of my children did. They have lovely shiny hair. It's not needed till puberty.
Brush hair daily IN FRONT OF TV and let this be main or ideally only tv viewing time.
Keep it plaited to avoid snarls.
Any screams, say calmly, 'well, we can cut it anytime you choose.'
But it IS a slog and I find it an effort - added to which it always has to be me, as DH can't do plaits.

nappyaddict · 09/10/2007 19:42

do just wash it with water and then put conditioner on then??

down to her kness

Jacanne · 09/10/2007 19:52

We use J&J tangle spray - it works really well.

morningpaper · 10/10/2007 11:32

Mine is just 5 but has been brushing her own hair for a year or so. Basically I said that I preferred her hair SHORT and if she wanted long hair then she wuold have to brush it every morning and night. I gave her a week's "trial" with a star chart and told her that if she didn't have more than 5 stars over the week then on Saturday we would get it cut off.

She FREAKED (because she has a Princess Syndrome too) and brushed it religiously. She is very SENSITIVE to touch etc. but this has worked really well.

I plait it for sleep and (now) for school but the brushing is all entirely HER now.

Flip

1 2