Extremely worried about 15 month old....

[vlove1]

First up
My son is booked for a hearing test. I have consulted with GP and Health visitor who (as soon as restrictions eased) will be doing a more on depth assessment.

I have two sons....
My older son is six.
He is severely autistic and was born 3 months early. He goes to an SEN school. He is non verbal .
Our youngest child is 15 months.
He has always been a big crier. Clingy . Breastfed. Wants to be latched all the time.
Always cried at baby groups..
Always cried when out and about.
Cries all the time
No allergies. No intolerances.

He does not point, does not clap, does not pass toys. He says absolutely no words. Doesn't respond to his name at all. If strangers talk to him he completely stares through them. Obvious.

He likes : breastfeeding, spinning wheels on cars, pushing cushions of the sofa.

He drags his head around like it's too heavy for his body.

He doesn't eat any meals and will nibble food I directly place in his mouth.

I got so worried a couple of weeks ago o phoned our GP (we live in a village) she got us to pop in and checked his ears for wax (none) his weight 47th centile and his head circumference 51st centile.

She's passing us on to heth visiting twa. And audiology.

I just know in my heart he isn't developing normally . He's so unhappy too
It's just really hard . Especially with his disabled older brother

OP I hope you’re ok, that sounds tough . You’re doing the right thing seeking advice

We're just giving this thread a bump to get it back into Active Conversations.

Sending good wishes, OP - hopefully some more Mumsnetters will be along soon with some advice and support.

Thanks ladies. I'm new to Mumsnet. Never used it before so not sure of I can reply directly.

I just hoped he'd develop normally and he'd look out for his older brother (he will never live independently)
I always assumed older son was autistic and delayed because of his prematurity.
At age three he got assigned to a panel at Oxford genetics who suspect their may be some currently un identified syndrome involved (a whole world I knew nothing about!! I had no idea that new syndromes are always discovered and investigated)
But the panel was torn on whether his unusual features and behaviour were in fact just from being preemie or something more. So his blood sample etc left on file as more research develops. He is physically SO healthy.

so we decided to have a second child.

Now I just feel like everything is my fault

Xx thanks for listening

Nothing is your fault OP & the halt on investigations due to covid makes everything so much more difficult.
Are you in any support groups with your older son?

Thanks. Again sorry; im not sure if I can tag you! New to MN

I'm in support groups for our eldest. But it's tricky - we're all very tired and it's hard to connect.

The kids at my son's school have quite severe learning difficulties (so not like rain man style autism. They are in nappies and don't speak :( )
We're all quite exhausted by the lock down and disturbance/extra care.

A couple of them have subtly said yes I think he's autistic.
But equally I think they don't wish it in us and feel by giving me hope that "they all develop at different times"

Might give me peace (if that makes sense)

But I just cannot shift my 1: gut feeling and 2: the fact he is so so far behind

I understand that, you just want answers. I’m so sorry you’ve been caught in the net of the system. It’s not fair on you or your son.
These times are very difficult but those with children with SEN are being very forgotten about & I’m so sorry about that.

Thanks for the support. I appreciate your kind words and acknowledgement xxxx I guess life is just gonna be very different again