6-7 year olds and friendship - well, I don't know where to start...

[Cappuccino]

I am a bit worried about my dd

she doesn't seem to get invited to playdates

they say at school she is popular and she plays with people from all different ages of the school

but whenever I see her (at school drop-off mainly) she is kind of yelling overenthusiastically at whichever child has taken her fancy, and they are looking uncomfy

also I don't know what they do this age about parties -- do they still do the big ballpool fandangos or are we are about small sophisticated gatherings now we are Older?

we don't seem to get invited to any anyway

I do wonder if she is not socially v good - and what worries me is I wasn't, I was deeply alone till 6th form - and whether her peers and their parents are a bit unsure about her physical disabilities (including slightly indistinct speech)

or are all 6-7 year olds social misfits who ignore one another?

dh says it is because he does school drop-off so he has not bonded with the other mums iin a playdate way

but I do it sometimes and neither do I. They don't speak to me much

Oh dear now I feel 10 years old again.

Message withdrawn

Once DS1 and DS2 began juniors it seemed the norm that parties got smaller. Why don't you arrange a playdate? Then you could get to know the other mum and would also see how your daughter related to her friend. Why don't you have another chat with her teacher and mention your more specific concerns? Hope things begin to improve.

I do invite kids they just don't tend to invite back

kids tend to be sullen oiks tho

Message withdrawn

maybe should invite mothers too for coffee after school

actually her fave boyfriend's mum is my friend

oh anniemac

maybe I should start getting the parents round

so they can watch her and realise it is okay?

oh yes I may well do that anniemac

I guess the other side of it is my worry that she is a little like I was at that age - just a little bit desperate, iyswim - she'll say stuff like "Why don't you play with me?" or she will get so excited at seeing a friend that she will shriek at them, and they'll get obviously freaked out

also she keeps wanting to hug kids who are obv not 'huggy' and you can see them flinching

I don't think she sees that it is a little bit strong for them

she's not cool at all, and I can see so much of me in that at that age, and my mum had no idea how to help either

annie I have saved your address, it would be helpful to chat because I do wonder what the future has in store

I just read your posts, and I really feel for you. It's so hard to think your child isn't liked, or is miserable. My ds has speech problems, but seems to make one friend at a time (5 years) and has playdates with them. Tends to be the sensible parents that I like. Can she do an out of school activity? My dd does Brownies and swimming and drama and I wanted her to always have somewhere to go/ friends not associated with school.