Nap problem

[caricf]

Hi all

I'm a first time mum so please excuse my ignorance but feeling very alone with getting my 7wo to nap.

He sleeps in the Moses basket fine during the night (3-4 hrs so it's not too bad which I can live with). However during the day he will scream or cry the min I put him down, whether drowsy or in deep sleep. I tried a darker room and swaddling and the most he managed is 30 mins max - and then he will just wake himself up and cry. I noticed he can drift off to sleep in the basket after chilling foe a bit on his own, but without seconds he will fight sleep and wakes himself up again. I've kept on trying but it ended up both of us in floods of tears, so I had to get him to sleep in a sling, otherwise he just won't get any sleep at all during the day.

I'm hoping someone would tell me this is not a unique problem - but I honestly feel like my child is broken. Especially given other NCT mums just don't have such problems....help :(

It’s not a unique problem. In my NCT group I am the only one with a baby who sleeps well during the day and at night. But essentially she feeds to sleep which is a bad habit.

I also have a 7 week old baby and sometimes she will nap ok in her bouncer chair and sometimes she will wake herself up. If I feel that she’s tired and needs to sleep, I keep her on me to make sure she’s rested. Once she’s slept for an hour or so I put her in the bouncer... if she stays asleep, great and if she doesn’t then at least she’s slept a bit. I don’t have any words of wisdom but at least you know you’re not alone! 😊

Thank you both. I'm desperately seeking solutions as it's mental torture listening to him cry the whole day. He sleeps really well in the sling but I'm worried we're creating a bad habit for him. There are so much differing research out there, some say indulge and skin to skin is good but others are adamant you need to train the baby to sleep. It's so frustrating that he won't sleep in the same place he sleeps at night!

It’s not you, or him, it’s just normal.

He’s still in the fourth trimester and just wants cuddles. I’d go with it if you can and hold him for naps until he’s older and able to get in a routine and self settle.

Would they sleep better on their own when they're older than 3m? At the moment it's like an uphill battle. Interested to know if fellow mums managed and get their bubs to sleep better...

Sleep deprived and looking for encouragement

Well, my son is 11 1/2 months and has just started sleeping through (was waking 1-3 times for a feed)..... but will still only nap while being cuddled or in the car.

It’s a total pain but I just get myself comfy and chill out while he naps on me. I get nothing else done but I’m sure he’ll grow out of it.

My daughter was similar too.

He is still so tiny! It’s perfectly normal for him to want to be with you. He is frightened when he is alone - imagine if you were him. He is totally dependant on you for his survival, so waking up and finding himself alone is terrifying! He needs you, so he cries out in fear.

Pop him in the sling. What harm will it do? My 11 week old only naps in the sling and it’s fine. I get on with my day and I have a happy baby who rarely cries and has slept through the night since 6 weeks old. I put it all down to him being worn so much in the day

I figure the worst thing that will happen is that either a) he continues to nap in the sling, which is fine as it doesn’t stop me from doing the things I need to do and it makes him happy, and/or b) I’ll have to cuddle him to sleep for naps when he’s older/in his cot/bed. Well, what’s wrong with that? My child will feel secure and happy and I get cuddles! I’m not bothered if it takes time - he’s my son, not an inconvenience to be dealt with and I’m not going to let anyone make me feel guilty or bad about that!

Please don’t feel pressured to ‘sleep train’ your baby if you don’t think it is what is best for your family. Personally, I think the whole thing is ridiculous. If your baby is rested, then they will be happier and more able to learn and thrive, which means you will be happier/rested and more able to care for them properly.

Good luck with however you decide to soothe your little one