Paranoid first time mum

[Fatback]

I have a 9 week old, month premature, NICU but now home and doing well. A few panic questions.

I worry about how mcuh I need to interact with him when he is awake. I talk to him and put him on a play mat to bash at things and read books etc but I feel really guilty if I leave him on his own to amuse himself - which he does really well and is very quiet when I ma doing other stuff.

When do they start being able to co ordinate their hands and leg moevements. He seems to bash his arms and legs around with no pattern.

Sleeping through the night - he was only a once per night but now sleeps through from 2130 to 0700. Provided he is getting enough feed during the day do I need to worry - he takes about 850-900mls during the day.

firstly big congrats on your bundle

interaction - tbh I think all of us 1st time mums feel like you do, you are doing all the rihgt things- interation at this age can be anything - even from watching you pack the shopping away if he's happy to amuse himself (and I assume you don't leave him on his tummy on the floor during this time) then leave him be the key ther is balance really.

co ordination - iirc happens about 3 months ish - starts by grabbing things, and learning depths/distances (or something of that sort- in a child way iycwim)

and sleeping - well done you, that's fantastic, I should worry as long as he's getting the feeds by day. if you are concerned you can introduce a dream feed when you go to bed but tbh if he's not waking for it i'd be reluctant to introduce it now.

(am hoping my advice isn't off centre as my DS was only 8 day ealry )

thanks - at the moment I feel like if he is awake then I should be interacting the whole time, which I know is not feasible.

He is such a quiet, placid and contented baby that I worry about everything - which I know seems crazy, with everyone else at the post natal clinic having tales of sleepless nights and screaming fits, you daren't admit to not! Everyone seems to think this is not normal but when he smiles and gurgles at me which he does all morning then I figure he is not doing too bad.

He sounds like a textbook baby. In terms of interacting, etc. I used to set a routine, got some tips from Tracy Hoggs' books, its more or less, having time to feed, followed by some playing time (what you do seems fine), putting them down for a nap and using nap time to do things for yourself. They don't need a lot of entertainment at such a young age, besides his actual age is one month less so no need to worry. You will become very in tune with his needs and will instinctively know when to up your entertainment, at this stage they just love staring at you and wathcing what you do. I used to put ds in a cradle in the kitchen or bathroom with me, and he used to watch in awe what was happening around him.

i always used to let ds amuse himself during the day - or watch me do housework, go on mumsnet etc ! but we have a small house so i was never out of sight. we had special playtime together in the morning and late afternoon.

anyway my point is, he was a similar temperamnt and now at 6 months he is really easy going, pleasant, smiley lovely little chap and everyone comments how happy he is. I'm sure that me allowing him time to explore his environment has contributed to that ! he's happy in his own skin - if you get what i mean !

Well done on the sleeping!! I def wouldnt wake him - that is really good as long as he is feeding well during the day.
Also great on the self amusing front - try not to worry about development - he sounds to me to be doing great! Enjoy him being tiny and so easy to put down somewhere and you know exactly where he'll be when you come back. (IYKWIM - soon he'll be all over the place)

You're doing all the right things - I think babies are never too young to be played with, read to etc - but at the same time you can't be expected to interact and amuse him all day when he's awake - he needs to be happy chilling and amusing himself too, or he could get too clingy and demanding later on (been there and done that with my first!), so relax, you're doing fine. As for sleep, lucky me, all of mine have slept lots at night from a very early age - no need to worry, he is obviously getting enough food in day to see him through. It won't last forever though - teething etc could shatter the peace !