Recommend me a 'discipline' book

[Lovage]

I'm generally up the attachment end of the parenting philosophies spectrum (so please don't recommend you-know-who (Voldermort?)) and would like some ideas for understanding and dealing with what I can see coming with my 13 month old. I don't really want to call it 'discipline' issues cos that's framing it in a particular way. The Sears call some of what i mean 'bothersome but normal toddler behaviours' which I quite like as a way of thinking - it's not necessarily a problem / them being wicked etc, it's just annoying / inconvenient to adults but hopefully if you can understand what's going on in their heads, you can think of ways to cope. I may eat my words in a year or so, but that's how I'm seeing it at the moment anyway!

Anyway, I've got the Sears 'Baby book' and was wondering whether it was worth buying their discipline book or whether that doesn't tell you much more than is in the Baby book. I also wondered about the Pantley 'No Cry Discipline Solution' having used the NCSS with some success. Can anyone recommend anything?

I like the Sears discipline book

you may also like Alfie Kohn, Unconditional Parenting

and definitely try "The Social Toddler" by Helen and Clive Dorman

Christopher Green - Toddler Taming is quite good. I've had some success with that one.

For later on the "How to talk so your kids will listen and listen so your kids will talk" is good too.

Good luck

there is big love on MN for Tanya Byron who has a new book out at the moment. hth

Another vote for The Social Toddler......

I'd recommend getting the discipline book at the library or 2nd hand, as you'll notice that many of the same examples appear in all of their books (really annoys me), and they don't offer much practical advice (although, like you, i like their general philosophy).

One I have recommended a lot is Karp's Happiest toddler on the block, but I would also say it is very American (a bit cheesy) and he takes the whole Cave Kid analogy a teensy bit too far. However, I have used the techniques in the book with success.

Later on, I started with How to talk so kids... and found it to be an extension of happiest toddler, and also very helpful.

Another vote for Unconditional Parenting.

I like Toddler Taming. TI know the title of it is terrible but the actual tone of the book is close to the "bothersome but normal" type stuff you are talking about. I don't agree with absolutely everything he says but lots of it is interesting and useful.

I reckon Dr Tanya's new book that she was plugging on here the other day is going to be good!

I really like her ethos.

I like the Sears' Discipline Book, full of common-sense advice by people who genuinely like children, and yes it is different enough from the baby book.

If its any help...

I got bought the 'Supernanny' book by a friend when i was pregnant (i thought this was a bit previous, but tbh, its been great), it covers from when they are tiny through to toddlers and how and when to discipline and what an age level will understand, also distraction techniques, whats normal, and a whole host of other things, reinforcing praise etc etc.

I have refered back to it over and over and have found it very useful in dealing with ds's (nearly 2) 'bothersome but normal behaviour' and the downright unacceptable (biting, hitting etc). also good for ideas on keeping them away from the bothersome behaviour in the first place.