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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

13 month old refusing meals.

12 replies

Mirage · 04/10/2004 13:06

My 13 month old dd used to be a fab eater & until last week,happily ate the same as we did.

About 5 days ago,she started turning away & crying if offered meals,she has stopped feeding herself too (unless it is toast for breakfast).

I am trying not to make a big deal out of it,but it is driving me crazy.Everything is being thrown straight onto the floor,finger food as well.The past few days I have just left her there with her food & after 20 minutes or so,taken her down from the high chair,regardless of whether she has eaten or not & not made a fuss.

She doesn't get snacks in between meals & apart from a bottle at night & first thing in the morning,only has water to drink.

What am I doing wrong? Has anyone had anything similar happen?

Should I just close my eyes ,count to 10 & repeat the motherhood mantra of 'This too shall pass'.

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bunnyrabbit · 04/10/2004 13:25

Oh Mirage. Yes yes yes.. DS is nearly 13 months and it's driving me mad. He's not quite as bad as your dd but... This week we had an apppointment on Wednesday so I got to give him breakfast before I dropped him at nursery. 3 mouthfulls then full on tantrem. Wouldn't let me feed him, wouldn't take the spoon, put his hand in a couple of times and just smeared himself with wheetabix. Oh yeah, and everytime I went in the fridge he started laughing.. so he obviously thought he was getting a yoghurt!

Took him down and just decided to ignore it. He ate everything at nursery for the rest of Wed and thurs. On Fridays I work from home... so at breakfast time I thought I'll try sitting him at his little table in his little chair like at nursery. Same thing happens Screaming fit. Ate a bit more after but then went ballistic. MIL takes him for the day and he eats his lunch no problem. Tea time and I'm feeding him. Eats half then has a fit....

Saturday breakfast, DH feeds him and same thing... so I decide to get tough. At lunch we put him at the table with us and when he started playing up I told him 'If you don't want any more then mummy will throw it away'... and I did! At tea time he ate the whole lot! Breakfast Sunday and Sunday lunch were all fine and also at the big table in the dining room.

So.... not sure if we've cracked it but I am being firm. If he finishes his sadndwich/cereal/main meal he will get offered fruit or a yoghurt, if he doesn't then I just tell him that I will take the food away if he doesn't want anymore and take him down and tell him why.

At nursery they all eat together so from now on we will make sure we eat with him at the table and see what happens.

Sorry for the long post, but we had quite a weekend of it too... I figure as long as he's eating some, and drinking his milk morning and night, then missing a few meakls will not hurt him.

One thing though, when he's teething he only likes cold food so don't know if this will help.

throckenholt · 04/10/2004 13:28

teething maybe ? Make sure she has lots of milk - that will keep her going for a while, and keep offering things she likes, but don't push it !

bunnyrabbit · 04/10/2004 13:37

totally agree throckenholt, not to push it. Just accept it and keep calm (1,2,3,4....)

Original poster

Mirage · 05/10/2004 09:02

Thanks Throckenholt & Bunnyrabbit.It possibly is teething as her fingers are constantly in her mouth at the minute.

Bunnyrabbit,I'm sure that our two are in secret communication somehow.It is quite spooky.

Well she refused lunch yesterday & threw her fingerfood on the floor.Wouldn't even eat yogurt.I tried again at 4pm,as she'd eaten nothing really since 9am & she still refused.By late afternoon she was weepy & clingy-not her usual self at all,but cheered up after some baby Nurofen,& did eat a few dry shreddies & some rice.

She has just started to walk & can stand unaided for a few seconds,so perhaps that hasn't helped.

I'll keep giving her milk & see what happens.

OP posts:

bunnyrabbit · 05/10/2004 09:14

Hi Mirage,
Have you tried just giving her one piece of finger food at a time? Sometimes stops DS dropping it on the floor just to see it drop if he only has one or two.

What about cold fruit? I find DS will nearly always eat cold banana when he's teething.

One other thing, there was one time he wouldn't eat, kept crying when he put something in this mouth. It turns out he had a throat infection and the sore throat was the problem. Do you think, if she's a bit clingy too, it may be something like this?

muminlondon · 05/10/2004 12:33

I agree - sounds like it could be a sore throat and/or teething (both probably!). Poor thing.

But aaaargh! I know how irritating it is. I'm going through a new phase with dd (19 months) - her nap has moved and she has to have 2 lunchtime snacks instead of a proper lunch (her meals used to be so balanced!). Novelty helps: different bowls, different spoons and forks (especially adult forks), bits off your plate. Doesn't work with my dd any more though - she's into snacks on the move and can't be bothered to use a fork now the novelty has worn off.

bunnyrabbit · 07/10/2004 14:42

How's it going Mirage?

I have DS for brekkies tomorrow so just wanted to know how it's going for you before I venture once more into the world of wheetabix in the hair!!

handlemecarefully · 07/10/2004 23:30

Faddy eating is the norm rather than the exception with toddlers....

My dd has phases when she eats well and phases when she will barely eat a thing for a few days. A fair number of my friends little ones are similar.

bunnyrabbit · 08/10/2004 09:52

Well we had such a lovely breakfast .

We both sat at DS's little table and ate our breakfast together. I did feed him but he didn't seem to mind. He ate 1 and 2/3 weetabix and kept trying to eat my breakfast. I did have to straighten him in his little chair a few times as he kept trying to turn round, which did annoy him, but he carried on eating when he say me eating. Apart from that he was gorgeous. .

Now I know he can do it and it's not the spoon/bowl/ or me that's a problem, I'm really not so bothered. If he starts playing up again I shall take the food away and leave it at that.

I am a very happy mummy and did not want to hand him over to PIL this morning ho hum....

happyspider · 08/10/2004 16:23

Mirage, if your dd has just started to walk, expect all sorts of unusual behaviour!

My ds, now 16 months old, changed completely once he started to walk, he refused to eat, starting waking up at night again (guess he was hungry) but was told it was because he was very excited about his new skill that anything else was loosing importance (food, sleep, toys...)

She should go back to her old self once she has mastered walking....

alicatsg · 08/10/2004 16:27

slightly at a tangent - when do you put them into a chair/table type thing rather than a highchair? ds is a year old now and likes his highchair - for a while.....

also how do you get them to use the spoon for anything other than pointing (and flicking food in the process??)

Jennisaurus · 10/10/2004 17:42

My DD does the same thing sometimes, I find it very very frustrating and I don't understand why she is not very hungry. No advice, I am sorry, just I can sympathise.

Sometimes I try and give her a few yogurts during the day if she has not eaten much, she likes them, and they are quick to eat.

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