4 year old, Possible processing disorder.

[DuckyMoDuck]

So my DS is 4 (5 in 4 months)

I've been fighting tooth and nail to get him seen by a paediatrician which still has yet to happen. I've recently had a meeting with his teacher, school nurse and SENCo team regarding concerns that something was wrong and people were refusing to deal with it.

He is not your typical 4 year old, he is currently under speech and language and is delayed by about 2 years. (He initial went at 2 and was only 6-12 months behind) However, he is delayed in all aspects. He needs routine and stability and as such gets on really well with pictures outlining what he has to do/what is yet to be done. He really struggles with verbal instructions.

The main thing that concerns me and the school have noticed however is sometimes it seems to lack any understanding. You can say "go to the toilet" and despite living in the same house for 4 years and he knows where it is, he sometimes will do things like open the front door/go in the kitchen and just cry. Its like he's suddenly lost ability and understanding to do something he previously knew.

The school and I, have also noticed he seems to forget things and we're not talking little things, we're talking about how at 2/3 he could count to 10 and now he can't count past 4 on a good day without throwing the numbers in a random sequence. We did touch upon how this isn't exactly new for him, he seems to go through stages where he's doing really well and then suddenly stops (as a baby he hit his milestones early, rolling, crawling, sitting, saying mama then come 7/8 months he stopped didn't walk to way past 1 and stopped saying words)

Has anyone encountered anything similar? Or could shed some light on to what It could be or what could look up/into to help him/us as a family.

I do agree with you that he needs to be seen by a development pediatrician, unfortunately the wait on the NHS can be long as you have mentioned. From your description of him, if he is delayed in most things then I assume that the nursery might be suspecting autism and/or some type of global development delay (they might not be telling you this as they might not be allowed). His need for routine, stability, struggles with simple instructions, potential struggles with spatial awareness are common with the above conditions. His ability to learn new things and then forget them days/months later are likely regressions and again are common with the above conditions, specially autism. The nursery will be aware of this, I would find it very odd if they are not. Is the nursery not able to bring a child psychiatrist or pediatrician in to observe him? if the nursery is one where you pay for a place (so not Government funded) they are normally able to do this.

*apologies, by nursery I meant school.

The school have been brilliant to be fair and as such have done so much for/with him. They're also at a loss as to what it could be do. They don't believe it's autism and he use to be part of programme when he was in nursery for children who had suspected autism, however after a term he was dismissed from the program due to no longer displaying the signs for Autism, so we're fairly certain it's not that.

He kind of ticks multiple things in multiple boxes however never fully enough that anyone can say "yes it's 100% that" if you know what I mean?

The school have had the psychologist in to see him who did a report but that was part of his EHCP as was the speech and language therapy although the latter does still keep in contact and visit him to help the school with supporting him.

The school does seem to have done everything they can, hopefully he will be able to see a pediatrician soon and get to the bottom of it. Is going private maybe an option? it could really speed things up. As for autism I agree, while some of the signs can be linked to autism they do not define autism. Autism is a social communication disorder and if he is communication with you and his peers to meet his needs and share his interests then it is unlikely to be autism. Though, I think the most concerning point is definitely the loss of skills, his ability to gain and later loose skills, as if suffering a regression, is certainly not normal and concerning. I do hope that you get to the bottom of it very soon - it is difficult to work on strategies if you are unaware of what could be hindering his progress.