Weaning from the breast

[LJSY]

My 9mo is exclusively bf and I am due to go back to work in the next month or so. She refused a bottle for a long time and I’m only just having progress with her taking formula from one!

I want to stop breastfeeding altogether now as I’ve totally had enough.

Does anyone have tips on how to go about gently stopping? She has quite a long feed before bed and feeds to sleep which I want to knock off eventually as I want to take it in turns with my husband to put her down!

Thanks

My first child did not want a bottle.... I had to be really persistent. Eventually she took it. The other two were more chilled.

I think you have to just make the decision and do it. I have been told it can be confusing going back and forth from bottle to breast but I don't know how true that is!

Neither of mine ever took a bottle, so I'm probably the wrong person to ask. There are however tonnes of old threads on bottle refusal in the MN archive.

What I would suggest though is a cup. Both of mine would drink from a cup if I wasn't around.

I'd pick which feeds you want to drop first, the ones where she will be at nursery are probably the best, at swap those first.

When you want to drop the bedtime feed, you could go out for a few evenings.

The current advice is to drop one feed every two weeks. This is to reduce your risk of mastitis.

If you want to talk it through with a BFC, the Helplines should be able to talk all of this through with you.

Don't worry about how much formula she takes at a tome either. BF babies typically take a floz an hour, so if she's been fed 3 hours ago, she's unlikely to take more than 3 floz.

If she was fully FF, by 10 months she only needs 400ml a day (13.5 floz) so it's really not an issue if she's not drinking much formula

Sorry, forgot to link to the guide which quotes how much food and formula they should have. Doh!

I'm interested to follow this. My 13 month old has been exclusively bf as she refuses a bottle. She started nursery at 9.5 months and it wasn't an issue, she just misses day feeds when she's at nursery (usually makes up for them by feeding all night ) She still feeds to sleep and feeds at least a couple times through the day and at night. I really don't think she feeds because she's hungry anymore I think it's just the comfort/habit but I'm so ready to stop now and don't know how

I'm in the same situ-going back to work in 2 weeks now. She wasn't taking a bottle at all, and I tried lots of different cups (probably a confusing amount but I ws getting desperate!)

It took a while but I finally had success with the nuk bottle (it's shaped more like a nipple). Weirdly in order for her to take the bottle, especially from me, I have to make it a completely different experience from bf - she sits upright not lying down, back again My tummy, head under my chin and it helps to have a screen to distract in front. Sounds odd but go with it (someone else passed this advice to me when I was getting desperate). She started to take with genital encouragement loe this - after a few weeks she is less strict about how she is held.

Timing wise, I tried slowly introducing One feed at a time but either I didn't leave enough time or it was confusing her- instead I dropped her cold turkey from day feeds - I feed her in the morning first thing and before bed/during the night but nothing in the day - even put a 'proper' bra on to deter myself. Took I would say 3 days for her to get it properly - now she is happily drinking the bottle in the day.

I would say half the battle is finding something they are conformable drinking from! Good luck!

Merrz do you think that night weaning might help for now?

Yeah maybe, just try and cut out the night feeds? I know i'm probably not helping myself but it's so hard when you're tiered and you know a quick feed will let everyone get back to sleep

it's so hard when you're tiered and you know a quick feed will let everyone get back to sleep. I found that too but it does get exhausting doesn't it? I had to feel a bit less tired in order to e able to tackle it if you get what I mean?

If you click on the link in my post, it gives a really gentle way of stopping night feeds

Thank you everyone for your advice. @JiltedJohnsJulie - The guide is very helpful!.

@annon789876 - Did your little one still want to feed for comfort during day when you went cold turkey? Did you need to express? Also how many bottle feeds did she have? I struggle as mines always fed on demand so how would I know if she just wants a comfort feed or hungry?! 😱

@Merrz - my DD was the same as yours. She started nursery at 13 months and we night weaned her at about 19 months. The only thing that worked was removing mum from bedtime altogether. Her mum would make a big show of leaving the house (in reality she just waited outside for a minute )

Then I would put her to bed and do all her night wakings. It took 2 weeks but she just kind of forgot about the boob eventually.

I kept doing bedtime and all night wakings for long while after as I enjoyed it.

Luckily it co-incided with having not much to do at work so tiredness didn't matter.

If your DP/DH can help out that might do it

@Curiousdad18 thanks for sharing that. Yes DH can help, will need to try that.

I had previously been on demand feeding too - the first few days she was fussy when settling and I distracted her with other things instead of settling with the boob and she just got used to it. Also, boobs felt quite full for the first few days but again, adjusted - you body is amazing at regulating to a 'supply and demand' deal with milk. Hope it's going OK 😊