HV no help at all

[ReallyLilyReally]

I'm actually kinda p**sed off with our HVs, they don't seem to have a clue what they're doing.

I'm worried about DD (12wks) as she really struggles with the bottle and is refusing the boob most of the time now too, she's had a stomach bug and a cold and she's barely eating. She's gone from being right on the 25 line to being just above the 2 line (in 4 weeks) but because she's only crossed one line they keep saying not to worry. I've asked about the feeding, asked about switching to formula, and they keep saying "just keep doing what youre doing" and fobbing me off. I cried last time i took her to be weighed, and the woman literally kept repeating those 6 words like a robot. What im doing isn't working, she's miserable and shrinking before my eyes and they are giving me as much support as a marshmallow walking frame.

None of them seem to have a clue what they're doing, they're all younger than i am and I don't think any of them have kids. Or any freaking medical training! My dad (retired doctor) says they basically just give them a textbook and turn them loose. Im kinda fuming. The GP refers me to the HV and the HV smiles at me while i cry and tells me to keep doing what I'm doing when it obviously isn't working and my baby is suffering.

Do you want to switch completely to formula? I think HV have nursing training first before becoming a hv but might be wrong

You have had a hard time with a cold and a tummy bug in the first twelve weeks. Of course with a cold, baby will struggle to feed. Also it is sometimes confusing to mix bottle and breast at this stage. Are you producing a good flow of milk? Can you express and try to cup feed?
If you are struggling with breast feeding, perhaps consider formula?
Your HV will have nursing and/or midwifery qualifications but you must decide what is best for you. I hope it settles soon.

She's currently EBF but I'm expressing and bottle feeding a few times a day because I'm going back to work in a few weeks. I'm pragmatic about formula but the HVs told me to keep breastfeeding.

Google tells me they have to be nurses or midwives, but tbh the ones I've met seem to have no clue what they're doing.

She was taking the bottle fine before Christmas and feeding like a champ, but now she's lost the plot on both and just cries when i try to feed her.

Change your gp asap and your HV changes too. If the gp is just referring you to HV then they are as useless as your HV. I can't stand it when people don't take you seriously! Try formula too. Breastfeeding doesn't work for every baby. Try feeding your baby little and often or when she's asleep it works better sometimes. She needs 150ml per kg of her body weight in 24 hours. She needs to feed well to get better and gain weight. Call them everyday if it doesn't get better and they might actually do something. Hope your baby gets better soon.

Any bob groups near you.? Or any Le leche leaque peer supporters? If so try them they may wel help.

I agree with trying to feed her when she's asleep, keep it dark and quiet, treat it as a dream feed. When she's awake, have you tried swaddling her to feed, was the only way to stop my son thrashing about. Other suggestions are infacol, perhaps something you're eating is unsettling her, maybe switch to formula just for that dream feed