6 year old masturbating

[Neverbeensoembarrassed]

My 6 year old daughter has discovered that she can pleasure herself...we have seen her doing it in the shower and whilst watching TV. I gently tried to explain that her body is hers but she should only do this in private. This morning I was called to the heads office as she was caught doing it at school in a lesson. Please please give me some advice in how to deal with this without causing her a life long complex but whilst stressing how inappropriate her behaviour is. I do not know what to do. I'm so mortified.

That is a serious problem but unfortunately I can't even see how it may be solved. I assume you've tried to explain her how inappropriate her behavior was but maybe you can tell her that other people would feel embarrassed because of her doing it. Also you may tell her that there are parts of out body which we prefer to cover and her actions are kind of breaking these rules.

Fearless has explained very well.

As your daughter was caught doing it in class, I would have thought the teacher or head could have taken her to one side and gently explained the same.

The head asked if we would speak to her first and said if it happens again then they would speak to her. We had noticed her touching herself recently whilst at home and also in the car. She was very open about it and said it feels really nice. She doesn't have any clue about any sexual connotations with what she is doing she just thinks it feels good. I had already said to her that she should only do this when she is alone but never thought for a second she'd do it at school. That was a real shock. I've just had a discussion with her straight away after school. I basically said she wasn't in trouble (I don't want her to grow up thinking the essence of what she has discovered is bad) but that we needed a serious talk. I asked her if she had done anything in the classroom that she shouldn't have done, and she looked down and said 'I touched my bum'. I asked her if that was ok, and she said 'no, its rude' (her words and her own understanding, I've not used the word rude that I'm aware of). I asked her what she should be doing in the classroom, and she replied 'learning'. I asked her where she could do it and she said on my own in my bedroom...then proceeded to tell me she did it last night. I don't know if I've done the right thing I just hope I stressed enough not to do it again. I even made her write it down that she will not touch her bum at school or around others, she usually follows a written rule better than being asked not to do something when her memory becomes very selective.

I think you're doing everything right here OP, it's a really awkward situation but you're correcting her gently and without imparting shame. Good on you!

OP can I ask if your explanation worked, I’m experiencing a similar thing with my DD she is four and I am struggling to cope with it...

I personally don’t think you should be telling her to do it alone in her bedroom at such a young age

@Jellybeans2224 why not?

My daughter has been doing this from around 18 months old, its completely normal. Obviously I wasn't able to tell her she should do that privately in her bedroom as she was so young and now at three she still does it every now and again. I think you've done all the right things especially being able to talk to her without implying what she's doing is bad. Well done, it's such an awkward thing to deal with when it starts happening. There will always be people that think it's awful and you should stop her and tell her she shouldn't do it. Mostly I ignore these idiots but occasionally I remind them that she is a child and has no idea about sex and has just found something that feels good for her, get a grip and sod off! Just keep doing what your doing.