Ds hysterically screaming when husband attempts the bedtime routine

[babyface83]

Hi all,

I'm looking for any tips or advice. Our DS is 4 months and old, his bedtime routine starts at 7pm. DH will give him a bath, whilst I'm pottering around, making a formal bottle, getting his pj's etc. DH is a really hands on dad, he sometimes falls asleep on DH during the day who then transfers him to his cot. In the morning if DS hasn't slept well DH will take him downstairs so I can get some sleep. There's no issues with DH comforting him/ getting him to sleep until bed time.

If DH tries put him to bed he screams/shrieks and goes bright red! It's horrible to hear so I will step in, which makes me feel bad because I know DH wants to be able to put him to bed.

Any suggestions would be appropriated.

What happens if you don't step in?

Pressed post too soon- my 3month old DD often gets v upset when her dad goes in to resettle her after bedtime, i think because she still prefers mummy the magic milk machine, but calms down after 5 minutes, 15 max

Thanks for the reply @ReallyLilyReally. I usually give a couple of minutes before stepping in.

Maybe I should give it some more time but I feel so bad for DS and DH.

If you are really determined to make this work, waiting for longer might be necessary. But do you have to make this work right now? My DD would have been hysterical without me at bedtime at this age. Some are very resistant to changes in their routine - their routine is all they have to allow them to predict what will happen next, they can’t reason that it’s still bedtime even thought it’s daddy. Are you prepared to give it a few months of you doing bedtime and have something else as daddy time?

My DS used to hysterically scream at bedtime at this age and was a bit worse for DH than me but generally just tired and wanted to get to the milk part of the evening! We just persisted with DH doing it and after a while he calmed down about it all. Now he loves Daddy doing bedtime and doesn't like Mummy doing it (he's 7 months now).

My DS is much better with Daddy if I'm not there at all - he can't see me. Worth a go? Also singing songs and distraction helped as he got a bit older.