Is this autism?

[permanentlyexhaustedchicken]

I suspect that my DD- just turned 3- has autism or is on the autistic spectrum. I was wondering whether, as she is my first and therefore my only point of reference, I am reading too much into the symptoms on google.

1. If she is tired or we change what we are doing (I.e leaving the shop to go back to the car) she can be very violent. I don't just mean the odd experimental hit, as most children try at one point or another while tantrumming, I mean biting, headbutting, kicking, scratching your face, rearranging how she's standing to kick you etc. I should add that she can also be sweet and lovely, but it is around 50/50.

2. She sometimes- but not always- struggles with making eye contact when talking.

3. She repeats the same games once she's learned them (e.g always lines her toys in a line for tea parties- though not always the same toys, always plays with her pretend till in the same way, always says the same thing on her toy phone etc.) other identifiers such as a preference for balance/symmetry (with blocks for example) haven't appeared.

4. if she learns a saying or word, she will often repeat it whenever the original context in which she learnt it cropped up. E.g, if I say "we don't want to be cold, do we?" while putting her woolly hat on, she will often repeat that exact sentence in the same tone of voice as I originally said it while putting her hat on in future.

5. she was delayed where some of the physical milestones were concerned. For example, when most babies were comfortably crawling/rolling over, she could only just about support her head sitting up. She came on leaps and bounds, but still shows remnants of being a little behind: she is nowhere close to jumping, can't use a fork, runs with both legs straight...

6. Add to this the fact that she was adopted and her older sister is severely autistic (non-verbal) as I know autism can have a hereditary element.

Sorry for the gigantic list and thank you if you finished it!

Did anyone have a similar toddler who did/did not then go on to be diagnosed?

Anyone? :-)

Some of your concerns may be associated with autism but quite equally they can also be associated with normal developing children, i.e. it can be age appropriate. Autism is a social communication disorder so that is the area that will give you the greatest insight. Does she point to share interests with you? (like a plane in the sky) and did since 18M old?, does she look at you from a distance when she is cautious or unsure (social referencing), does she look at you when she does something that she is proud of? (praise seeking), does she show/give you interesting things that she finds, or used to do this when she was younger? (like an interesting rock or leaf from the ground), etc - those are all examples of social communication which autism tends to impair in young children.

She does all of those things too. At what point would it be more obvious either way?

Then it is unlikely to be autism. For child to show all those examples of social communication at 18M old and still be showing them by 3YRs old and have autism would be extremely rare (even in girls which tend to be very good at masking compared to boys).