How should I handle this?

[kkgirl]

One of my ds's "friends" keeps being violent to him. I have tried to keep out of it and encouraged him in ways to deal with it.
Each week at football training, he is coming home crying because so called friend has kicked or punched him.
Can't decide to speak to the mother at school, or to take child aside and have a quiet word with him.
Any ideas please.

on of my ds's 'friends' is like this, but veers more towards verbal taunting. It manifests itself in school but also at cubs and other out of school activities. Tempted though I am to speak to the mother,I know I will sound angry if I do. I won't be able to help myself. And she is very slow to react - I don't know why but it doesn't give me hope she will be particularly sympathetic to me or my ds.

At the moment I don't think direct confrontation is the best way forward. What I do do is tell the school. I have written letters and seen my sons teacher( took my son along too). I tell them that 'x' is upsetting my son and seems to be the instigator at least some of the time. As my son is prone to react back - whether it's talking or hitting back - I wanted to tell the teacher of a potential problem between these two boys as I don't want my son to get into trouble at school. By being aware of the problem the teacher can hopefully prevent any flare ups in the class before they happen.

It worked having my son as witness so he knew both his teacher and I supported him and wanted him to speak up if he was teased or hit by this boy.

Good luck!

kkgirl - sounds a bit like my problem but more extreme. I was very tempted to mention casually to the mother but listening to everyone here maybe school is the best place - the football coach? Must be very upsetting to know that your ds is being physically hurt

Can you go to training and see what happens and take it from there? Agree with tigermoth too, get the teacher involved if possible. I don't think you can do much more until you've tried these things tbh. Also, if he's a so called friend can you have him to tea and watch them carefully, see how they get on, try to see what's at the bottom of it? Might not be appropriate but thought I'd suggest it anyway.