13 month old communication skills

[surreygirl1987]

Quick question...

I was very anxious about my son when he was tiny (regarding health, milestones, autism etc) but haven't been anxious about him at all in the last few months. He's doing well, almost walking (well, getting closer!) and learning new stuff every day.

However, something worried me today. My friend commented that she had taught her daughter to turn on the tv. She just has to say "Sara, turn on the tv", and her daughter will walk over to the tv, press the button, and turn it on. She said it like it was no big deal. I said 'wow that's amazing... I can't imagine my son following instructions like that st the moment! She's so smart!" And my friend looked a bit concerned and said "Is he really not doing anything like that yet? Sara's been doing this for a while now".
Now, my friend is lovely and I'm sure she didn't mean to concern me. This isn't about her. But I just wanted to check... is it okay that my son isn't following instructions yet? He's 13.5 months old (my friend's daughter is 5 weeks older).
He responds to his name (or at least my voice saying his name!) usually, I'm pretty sure he knows the word know, I think he understands "pick-up" (or maybe he can tell what I'm about to do from my movement and body language)... but I really don't think he understands massive amounts yet, or at least, not well enough to follow instructions like my friend's daughter. It just threw me as I thought he was doing great. I had a quick look at the 14 month ASQ and he does seem to be slipping further behind a little? I talk to him all the time, and he goes to nursery and doesn't watch tv and I read to him lots every day, so I don't think I'm doing anything massively wrong... I just want to check that he's within the norm for his age, as I know poor communication skills can be an indicator of autism?

Sorry for the ramble. If anyone can let me know how typical this is for 13.5 months, I'd be grateful. For context, they played together in my house today and I didn't notice any significant difference between them (except my son has more tantrums!).

She may have said it because if it's her first child, she really has no idea that these things vary. Certainly not all 1 year olds can follow instructions. Some can...others might take until they're more like 15 months.

Don't fret...google it "At what age can a baby follow commands?"

If he can tell what you mean by you're bodily movement when you're about to pick him up, he sounds fine to me.

Brilliant, thanks. Yes - it's her first child and mine too. I haven't been worried about him at all lately as he seems to be coming along nicely and developing all the time
... but today just threw me a little. I'll Google it now and stop panicking about the 14 month ASQ. Thanks for your reassurance!

She's just showing off if it's true, don't worry. My niece is 20 months and considered very ahead in communication for her age nursery are moving her up classes because she is getting bored and I know for certain she wouldn't be able to turn on the TV on commandat 13 months.

Remember boys tend to develop later than girls when it comes to language.

Your DS sounds pretty normal to me. Most don’t have the attention span to follow instructions even if they understand them!

Hi,
My DS has just turned 17 months and he’s only just starting to really follow instructions. He didn’t for ages, and I was starting to worry then all of a sudden he’s following things I say/ask a lot of the time.
I would say don’t worry yet OP, there’s such a variation in development. Your son sounds totally normal!

Girls generally develop communication skills earlier than boys so I would not worry about not being able to follow instructions at 13-14 months. A lot of boys fall into the "grey" area on the communication section of the ASQ-3 questionnaire until they reach approximately 3-3.5 years of age.

There are lots of people decades older that can't follow simple instructions.

Certainly nothing to worry about at 13 months.

More seriously - my daughter would, my son wouldn't

Both now functioning adults

Fab thanks. Very reassuring answers. Much appreciated!

Hey @surreygirl1987 I know this is an old post but do you have an update xxx

Gosh, this was a while ago! He's 6 now!

So he was a bit delayed with speech and got referred to SALT (but then could speak by the time we got an appointment so that was cancelled). He then seemed to communicate fine.

Turns out though, he is autistic and had ADHD. But he's utterly brilliant and super clever and sociable etc. Poor early communication CAN be a sign of this but isn't always. What I woule say though, is if I had my time again I'd have probably got a private SALT to have a look at him. Please don't worry though. I bitterly regret the many hundreds of hours I spent worrying about my little boy and for nothing - he is amazing and lovely xx