My DS is 4 soon and has been a challenging child since just before he turned 3. I thought he was coming out of it as his behaviour had improved since the summer, but the last couple of weeks he's been worse than ever.
Every little thing is a battle - getting dressed, meals (which he previously was always fine with), leaving the house, or basically whenever he doesn't get 100% his own way. He makes unreasonable requests that he knows won't get fulfilled (eg this morning asked me for a story as I was going in the shower, I said as soon as you're dressed we can have a story, but that was met with shouting NO and hitting). Every time he doesn't get his way or is asked to do something he doesn't want to do, it's met with shouting, screaming and hitting.
He has a baby sibling who is 9 months, and has obviously recently become very jealous of them, but no amount of positive attention/praise seems to be working. I have tried ignoring bad behaviour where possible (although I won't ignore hitting) and praising every tiny little thing he does remotely well. Paying loads of attention to him, offering stories, cuddles, to play games etc. Most of the time he doesn't want to.
I've also tried time outs, the step and his bedroom, for violent behaviour eg hitting. I have in the past tried a sticker chart (months and months ago now) which worked for a little while but the novelty soon wore off.
Both DH and I lost it with him on Sunday as he was just constantly horrendous. And this morning I'm ashamed to say I smacked him on the back of the head, which I have never, ever done before and don't condone doing at all. It wasn't hard, but of course he cried and was very upset. I said sorry afterwards and explained that I was just so sad and cross from being hit so many times already that morning. The worrying thing is he was actually very good and compliant for a short period of time after the smack!
Please help! I don't know what to do. The health visitor is coming out to give me some advice but not for two weeks.