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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

DD 4.8, scared to try swimming lessons

10 replies

kamsmum · 21/08/2007 12:38

I feel that it is so important that my dd learns to swim (I never did ). I have booked a course of lessons for her, which starts on Saturday, but she is starting to get upset at the thought of it and really wants me to cancel them.

Should I just cancel, or does anyone have tips for helping her get over the nerves?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

MaureenMLove · 21/08/2007 12:46

TBH, I'd cancel. There was a thread on lerning to swim only yesterday and you'll see from that, that she's still quite young. If she's scared and making a fuss about it, you'll only make it worse. I'll see if I can find it for you.

MamaG · 21/08/2007 12:47

Cancel, but start going swimming with her, just for fun with you in the pool

zubb · 21/08/2007 12:49

Has she been to the pool before? is she usually OK there?
The people who take these courses are normally used to this.
With ds1 he spent the whole of the first lesson just watching from the steps at the edge of the pool. When he came out I told him he had done really well and he looked at me and said 'but I didn't do anything'! I said he'd got in the pool and that was great (apparently more than some children do so your dd won't be the first).
Second lesson ds1 was first in and did everything!
He was just unsure with the first lesson as he didn't know what he was meant to do - it wasn't the same as going with me to the pool and wearing armbands.
Maybe if you can take her to watch a lesson before she starts that would help her.

LIZS · 21/08/2007 12:50

Can you find out what it is she is worried about ? The noise, being out of her depth, you not beign with her ... ? Are you able to take her yourself before Saturday or go and watch another class .

MaureenMLove · 21/08/2007 12:51

Here we are

Flyonthewindscreen · 21/08/2007 12:52

Is there something in particular that scares your DD about swimming lessons i.e. having to put her face under the water? If so you could reassure her that she won't have to do have things that really scare her and persuade her to give the first class a go, say she won't have to go again if she really hates it. She will probably enjoy it when she gets there.

My DS (now 5yrs 7m) has been going to lessons for 18 months now, has a a great time but still can't swim and I wonder if he is just not ready, so I wouldn't worry if your DD is adamant about not having swimming lessons at this stage.

Good luck

KamR

Original poster

kamsmum · 21/08/2007 12:59

Thank you so much for all your replies. They are all so helpful.
She used to love splashing about in the pool but recently she has gone all "scaredy"!
I think maybe we have put too much amphasis on swimming and not enough on fun recently.
I will ask her if she wants to go and watch. I never thought about that.

OP posts:

Hurlyburly · 21/08/2007 13:06

You know I wouldn't cancel, yet. My DD is always telling me she doesn't want to do this or that or the other. Tis painful sometimes. But around 90% of the time, she doesn't really mean it. Taking her to watch a session sounds like a really good idea, but I'd talk to her as well. Try to get to the bottom of whether it is a real fear (in which case trying to jolly her out of it would be counterproductive) or just a lack of inclination at that time (in which case cheerful and bracing is the right sort of response).

fuzzyfelt · 21/08/2007 13:11

Hi. Is she normally reluctant to try new things? My DD asked to do swimming lessons but then got panicky about it before they started. She would cautiously enjoy the lesson once there but then would start to worry about the next lesson the nearer it got. I felt fairly sure though that once she achieved something (anything!) out of it she would be OK and she was.

We also went swimming as a family during the week to build on her confidence and make it a fun family thing to do

I asked a swimming teacher about it and she said it was very normal for a child to worry about swimming. She said try for 3 weeks and if she is adamant about not going, very worried still, then give up and try again when older.

My DD swam 5 m the other day and has no worries now. It is a difficult call though as you don't want to push too much. Only you know your daughter well enough to make a decision.

SofiaAmes · 22/08/2007 06:14

Just hand her over to the teacher and walk outside for the duration of the lesson. My dd cried through her first 3.5 lessons. And then all of a sudden she realized that it was actually quite fun and kept asking why didn't she have lessons more often, etc. etc. We have a swimming pool in our back yard (los angeles), so it really wasn't an option to cancel our lessons because dd was upset...but I'm glad that I perservered, because she now loves swimming and is absolutely fearless in the water. Make sure you get your dd goggles for her lesson. It helps elimnate the issue of water in the eyes.

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