Constant pestering of a nearly 4yr old...

[Nemo2007]

how on earth do I deal with it
Just been to get some milk[only had £3] and he asked for absolutely everything, he asked for
gingerbread men [no]
bottled water [no]
milk we were getting
lollipop [no]
bread [got small crusty loaf to go with tea]
toys[no,why,because I dont have the money and you have plenty,why,because I said no,why [continue for 15mins]
on the way home he wanted to go
on holiday
to the park
to the airport
to the beach
to someones house
to school

etc etc it just goes on and on and on with each reply of no we cant or explanation being met with a tantrum

Mines nearly 5 yo and isn't getting any better so can sympathise.

oh god was hoping there was some sort of 'cure' pmsl

Can only sympathise I am afraid but DS (4 in November) can go on and on and on and on and on and on.......

Have a feeling DD (22 months) isn't going to be any different....

Mine is four, asks for EVERYTHING, I say no all the time and feel like a great big meany.

I don't think there is a cure to stopping them asking for stuff.

With the shop thing, I always say what I am planning to buy in advance, he's 4 now and just got used to this. If he asks for toys etc, I'll say we'll put it on the birthday list/in the letter to Father Christmas. It hasn't stopped him asking for stuff, but he does accept these answers without too many whys/angry outbursts.

With the places thing, you could try listing all the places you'd go if you had the time/money eg the moon, the Island of Sodor etc and hope the silliness of the game takes his mind off it.

I think accept that going to the shop for bread and milk is stultifying BORING when you're 4. So you just have to EXPECT that he will ask for other stuff. I know that doesn't help much but as with everything, having realistic expectations can just remove a little bit of the stress.

With his repeated requests going on for 15 mins I would answer once, explain again, then that's it. Be a brick wall about it; but that doesn't mean ignore him, I'd try distracting him with talk of a million other things.

instead of saying no all the time to his requests to go on holiday/school etc (bless him) I would try to say yes; as in "Oh, YES, wouldn't it be lovely to go on holiday! Do you know, my favourite place to go on holiday would be......the beach. And I'd have to have chips for lunch every day. Where would your favourite place be?" etc etc.

or if it's about going to school, don't just say no, say "ooh, what would that be like? ALL the teachers are away, ALL the children....do you think the classroom will be all quiet? Will there be cobwebs?" etc etc etc.

Half the time I think kids are doing it just because it's habit/they can't abide a silence! Answering in a different way gives the chance for the conversation to get out of the no/tantrum spiral.

Agree wholeheartedly with HG.

imo, the correct reply to "I want a ...." is "Do you?"

Irritating, but HG's advice works with my 3 1/2 year old. The "Do you" usually works too. Try it and see. Good luck.

have tried do you or even ohh thats nice and talking about something else but he just carries on or asks for something else.

ds is the same - only consolation is that they move on so fast from one thing to the next - they didn't really want the thing in the first place iykwim?
worse would be if they asked for the same thing over and over again.
I usually get ds 1 toy/mag/sweet if he's shopping with me - but nothing over £1.