How to deal with having a small baby compared to others ?

[Emily312]

Hi everyone,

I know I shouldn't compare , it's just so hard sometimes.
My little girl has had problems with her growth , it's a long story but we currently are feeding her via an NG tube.
She's 5months old and weighs 12lbs.
A friend of mine has a 10 week old who weighs the same :(

It's just the looks and the questions from others as well.
I know it shouldn't matter....

Our DD was born at 29 weeks, weighing 3lbs, and spent the first six weeks in hospital, and was consequently somewhat delayed in her growth and development for the first year or two. Of course, lots of family and friends were very worried about her, and about us, and we dealt with plenty of questions over this time, from family, friends and strangers.

However, this was not something that I ever felt sad about, or ashamed of. I was proud that my DD was making progress in her own time, and I never felt a failure even though my body let me/her down by failing to carry her safely to term.

I’m sorry you’re feeling like this, and can only suggest that you concentrate on the positives: your DD is much loved, much wanted, and is getting the help she needs to thrive. Try not to compare with others.

If you’re really struggling, it might be worth having a chat with your GP. It’s not uncommon to develop post-natal depression or PTSD after a bumpy start for your little one.

What centile is she in for weight? Is that somewhere between the 2nd and 9th? I have a small child (2nd centile) with no health problems at all. Someone has to be at the top and bottom of the centile charts and 2nd centile is still within the range of normal. Are doctors concerned about her weight?