Age appropriate or personality?

[notupsettingpeople]

I've NC for this.
I know a 4 year old who seems to actively enjoy seeing other children hurt or upset. The child is bossy, which many 4 year olds can be, but also seems to go out of their way to cause upset and arguments amongst their peers, then enjoy the drama they have caused. Is this normal development for a 4 year old? Am I seeing the personality of the child or is it something they will most likely grow out of?

I guess every child is different, but when I've witnessed this in the past I've tended to find it's just a bid for attention - by causing an issue or upset they are learning that they can make a impact and people notice them. I know you said it is someone you know, but if it was my child or a close friends then I would get them to talk about their feelings and how they think their actions make the other children feel.

I think the antagonism is perhaps a separate issue. I am genuinely concerned at the pleasure derived from other people's pain - today a peer had an accident which could have been really nasty. The child stood and laughed and laughed. I explained that it wasn't nice to laugh at someone else and they could have been really hurt. They replied "I'm just laughing at myself " when clearly, there was no reason for that to be the case. This child is manipulative and deceitful, which I know all children are/can be to some extent, I'm just uncomfortable with how much they enjoy other people's pain. I haven't come across other children this age who are like this, but perhaps that's just my experience and this one will grow out of it. Or maybe they won't