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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

When do they start to show affection?

17 replies

Izabella · 01/08/2007 20:48

DD is now 11 months and I kiss & cuddle her on a regular basis, have done ever since she was tiny. But she has never really shown any physical affection back to me. I get lots of smiles and giggles but when I hold her close to me she pushes me away and would rather poke me in the face or pull my hair. She won't even cuddle up to me in bed anymore and she has only raised her arms to be lifted once.

Any advice? Has anyone else have a child like this? When do they change?

OP posts:

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berolina · 01/08/2007 20:50

Normal! I don't think ds really showed 'affection' in that sense until well into his second year - possibly 18 months or so. (He started wanting to be picked up a little, but not much, earlier) He's 2.2 now and always asking for 'cuddy and kissy mama', running up and hugging us

Tutter · 01/08/2007 20:51

same as berolina - ds1 (now 2.2) only started giving cuddles maybe 6 months or so ago

Biglips · 01/08/2007 20:55

must be summat wrong with my dd, who is 3 in Oct. She is very much like me, had has always been an affectionate child from a very early age, about 1 but im not complaining, i dont want it to stop though or ill be pining for the cuddles and kissies!!...

GColdtimer · 01/08/2007 20:55

Give it a few more months and she will be showering you with them. DD has just started and she is 15 months. (it is very, very sweet when they start).

fingerwoman · 01/08/2007 20:56

my ds was exactly like that, wouldn't even sit on my lap. even if he hurt himself he wouldn't be comforted. was a bit
but at 2 and a half he is suddenly lovely and we have hugs and "wet kisses" all the time lol

Sophiale01 · 01/08/2007 20:58

mine's the same. she pushes me away constantly. she does seem to give her a favourite teddy cuddles and kisses though

LadyOfTheFlowers · 01/08/2007 21:01

ds1 didnt really start till 1.5 and ds2 is 10 months and pushes his slobbery face up against mine and coos at me! lol

they are both very different though and this was apparent very early on.

as others have said, it will come soon and when it does you will showered!

HighlandFling · 01/08/2007 21:04

My ds is 14 months and he always pushes me away when he is in my arms. Usually cos he wants to angle round and see what's going on in the opposite direction...boring old Mummy!

I am trying to teach him to 'Give mummy some love' He looks at me like i am bonkers...

I am however starting to see glimmers of slobbery kisses but he always does it with a giggle and sometimes a little bite to keep me on my toes.

Reading this thread, i can't wait for all the slushy stuff to kick in in a few months (fingers crossed)!!

womba1 · 01/08/2007 21:05

My dd is 18 months and very affectionate. If you pucker up for a kiss she sticks her tongue out and lunges at you. And when cuddling her, if you say "give Mummy/Daddy/ Whoever, loves", she leans into your chest and says "awwwwww".
She's been doing this for about 6 months now.

Loopymumsy · 01/08/2007 21:07

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CatIsSleepy · 01/08/2007 21:15

My dd is 15 months now and extremely wriggly and non-cuddly most of the time. I also get lots of pokes!

However fairly recently I've noticed she will now submit to being cuddled -and possibly even enjoys it -when she's tired, but still only for a short time. We usually have a nice cuddle after I've brushed her teeth at night-I think she expects it now.

And today when I came to pick her up from the childminder she came and hugged my legs which is a first...

CatIsSleepy · 01/08/2007 21:16

I've also noticed when we are with a bunch of other people she will suddenly get a lot more cuddly and from time to time come and fling herself on me (I guess it's partly a security thing but I can't help liking it)

orangehead · 01/08/2007 21:21

I have 2 boys both very affectionate from prob about 1 yr maybe earlier all my friends who have boys are the same, but my friends who have girls they all seem alot less affectionate

Original poster

Izabella · 01/08/2007 22:07

Thanks everyone. Makes me feel a lot better about things. I guess I just have to be patient.

Sophiale01, I know what you mean about the teddy. DD's favourite blanket bear gets hugs & kisses galore.

OP posts:

Woollymummy · 01/08/2007 22:21

My DD is nearly 14 months old, always very excited to see me return home or enter the room, will crawl over to me panting "Mum, Mum, Mum", has just really got into kissing me and DH when kissed, but never really initiated cuddles until this w/e when she and I were both ill, spent all day Sat being mopey at home, and every 10 mins or so she would come up, kiss me,or ask to be picked up, or tilt her face up for a kiss, and I realised how much all the wriggly independance I sometimes get is just a big cover-up for a very affectionate tender little soul.

SlightlyMadSpider · 01/08/2007 22:24

DD has just started giving kisses and 'arrrrr' cuddles at 15m. Although she is very picky as to when she will do it and if you ask when she doesn't want to she will shake her head quite ferociously.

boo64 · 01/08/2007 22:48

Never if you are my dh (and he's 40!)

Sorry not very helpful but couldn't resist...

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