DD1 is almost 5 and is starting school next month.
Other the past year her behaviour has been awful. She refuses to do anything you ask of her – outright and then has a massive meltdown. This morning I asked her to watch a cartoon on her bed in her room whilst I had a quick shower in the bathroom (I got her ready first and we were having a lovely morning together) and came back to find her room trashed and her sisters room trashed (DD2 is 3 and both rooms were trashed and I suspect they did it together). I asked her to put her books back on the shelf and her hair bands back and for her sister to do the same in her room and she refused saying she cant do it on her own. I explained why she needed to do it and that her sister was being asked to do the same thing but she still refused so I said if she doesn’t then she cant go to her nursery leaving room this afternoon as ill be too busy tidying up, she still refused and said ‘I will be going’. I admit after 5 minutes of telling her to do it I shouted at her to do it and asked why its so hard and told her she wont be going this afternoon. I gave her 10 minutes and asked it to be done and no she still refuses so I confirmed that I would cancel nursery. I have left her to it and have said she wont be coming down until she has done what I have asked her to do. So now shes been upstairs in a heap screaming that she isn’t doing it. Its now 20 minutes later.
I am just so sick and tired of this every time we need to do anything- my house is a tip as she trashes things whenever my back is turned and then refuses to tidy up. I spend most evenings and weekends just tidying up or trying to stop her damaging stuff. It happens every couple of days and I am concerned that if I don’t follow through with the consequence then it will just get worse.
Aibu to ask you if im doing anything wrong, I just don’t know what to do to make things easier and im wondering if its me making her worse.