Idea to help parents discipline and reward kids - Opinions wanted please!

[samcamcan]

Hi Everyone, I am new to Mumsnet after years of reading the message boards, so big hello! I am a mother to an 11 yo boy and stepmother to a 13 yo girl who are very hard work at times (aren't they all?!) They are very lazy in terms of doing chores and constantly back chat! I have tried reward charts (but they are a bit too old now), cash incentives (pocket money), removing phones etc, but nothing seems to stick! So I came up with an idea for an app based subscription box service to incentivise them to follow the rules. The thinking was that as the "reward chart" is on a format that most kids are obsessed with (phones and tablets etc) then they may be more receptive to it! Its just as idea at the moment, and this post isn't a plug for it, I just wanted to hear from other parents to find out what they thought of it! Please have a look at the website, read the bio and watch the video and I would be hugely grateful for any and all feedback (even if its bad!) Thank you! www.intzybox.co.uk

I don't have any feedback for you (didn't check the site), but I generally think that when they are (almost) teenagers it's mostly too late for any significant changes.

I agree that it is a lot harder once they reach a certain age, but I do believe that, generally speaking, you can still learn new behaviours and attitudes (at least I hope anyway!)

I agree with a PP that by the time they're old enough for mobile phones/apps they're probably a bit old for reward charts.

Also, I think the whole idea of rewards/punishments is a bit out-dated now. There seems to be more of a focus on intrinsic motivation/encouraging a growth mindset...

I’m interested to find out if a lot of people believe that 10 and up is too late to learn new behaviours and values? Personally I have not found this, granted it is harder than if they were younger, but since I started using incentives in my household, the kids have started to become more responsible.

I don't think it's too late to learn new behaviours and values, I think it's too late for significant changes. The bases have to be set by then, I believe. The rest is only damage control.