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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

I feel like a monster!!

20 replies

gr8kids · 26/07/2007 10:07

Had such a rough night with ds 16wks old, his got a blocked nose and have tried everything in the past 2 weeks to help. Iv been told its cause of teething. Im shatterd!! So i tried putting him down for a nap 30 min ago and he wouldn't stop screaming wanted me to carry him around. I just don't have the energy for anything at the mo and got very angry with him. So I put him in his cot and walked away. His only now just fell asleep and i feel like a monster. I need to be honest and say that i just felt like hurting him. Has anyone else felt that way and am i the worst mother ever????? I feel crap crap crap crap and in tears!!!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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Budababe · 26/07/2007 10:11

You are not crap. You are tired. The Chinese used to use sleep deprivation as a form of torture!

You didn't hurt him. You just put him down for a nap and let him cry.

Have never heard of a stuffy nose being a result of teething TBH but maybe. Have you tried using anything? I think you can use Snufflebabe.

meemar · 26/07/2007 10:13

gr8kids - sleep deprivation can make you feel emotions you'd never imagine you could have.
The important thing is that you put him in his cot, walked away and didn't hurt him! This makes you a great mother!

Cry and get it out of your system and remember - most of us have been there.

Sending you a big hug x

IntergalacticWalrus · 26/07/2007 10:19

You did the right thing by putting him down. Tbh, what you are feeling is very normal for new, sleep deprived parents.

As for his stuffy nose, snufflebabe is good, as is putting a bowl of hot water in his room with a couple of drops of olbas oil, or putting the olbas oil on a muslin somewhere near his cot. That used to clear my boys noses when they were tiny.

You souind exhausted. Is there anyone who can come and coo over the baby while you get a bit of kip?

IntergalacticWalrus · 26/07/2007 10:21

Something else you can try for his stuffy nose id to take him into the bathroom with you wile you have a nice long shower. He'll be alble to see you and the steam will do him good.

Original poster

gr8kids · 26/07/2007 10:22

Thank you i desperately need a hug Have tried snuffle babe, karvol, olbas oil on burner in room, popped cot mattress up, open window, closed window, nasosal, selin drops. I know it sounds like a hell of alot to try but its been over two weeks and none of the above has helped. Could it be hayfever or something like that. He normally sleeps through from 9pm-6am but with a struggle to breathe his waking every hour. Don't know just how much more i can take. His just woken now again.

OP posts:

IntergalacticWalrus · 26/07/2007 10:26

From what I can remember with mine, snotty noses are pretty much par for the course. DS1 had one until he was 18 months (although mostly it didn't bother him at all)

I was going to suggest popping some books under the legs of the cot to tilt it a bit, but I see you have tried alreday.

If you are worried that he does have hayfever or siilar (I'm not an expert on allergies) it might be worth having a chat with your HV.

DS1 was a really uinhsettled baby, it's horrible. But he's settled down now. It does get better.

Leati · 26/07/2007 10:26

Your just tired. Use some teething tablets they really help with teething and sleep. Stop beating yourself up and go to bed while he is sleeping.

Original poster

gr8kids · 26/07/2007 10:36

Thanx everyone. Im going to try the steam now and the teething gel. Give him a feed and a cuddle and hopefully get a nap.

OP posts:

Tortington · 26/07/2007 10:40

you did the right thing entirely by walking away- well done you!

i can't tell you how many times i pushed the twins into the kitchen ( in those bouncy chair things) shut the door and wept for hours

cinnamontam · 26/07/2007 11:24

Hey gr8kids. I've got a 9 week old daughter and when she has her screaming fits I'm always so worried about the effect it's having on her. Then i was talking to my Mum and she reminded me that my little brother (11 years younger than me) screamed for the entire 1st year of his life. He is now the most chilled, independent, loving 24 year old man. That made me feel much better and less anxious. Just wanted to share that with you

MadamePlatypus · 26/07/2007 20:07

People have lots of feelings. The point is you didn't hurt him. You put him down for a nap. He was tired, you were tired. You did the right thing.

callmeovercautious · 26/07/2007 21:24

gr8kids - I talked to you on your previous thread. Hope you have had some rest now.

Having had a DD similar in temprament to yours I know just how you feel, please do not feel bad or alone. I would talk to the HV about her stuffed nose as it could be more than teething such as a dust allergy.

I log on most days (several times!) so if you need to blah at someone feel free!

Remember why you chose your name

TheGoddessBlossom · 26/07/2007 21:27

oh sweetheart, totally second what all these others have said, you DIDN'T hurt him, so don't feel bad, you can't help your thoughts and thoughts don't hurt people!!

It's so hard when you are tired, so so hard, everything is ten times harder than it should be. You both need a decent chunk of kip, you'd be amazed how much better everything seems after that.

Bloss

xxxxx

BarbieLovesKen · 26/07/2007 21:33

sorry - only read op - when I read the title I thought I was going to read something terrible - what are you talking about, you poor thing?! you exhausted! your a new mammy! I have definitely felt like this before! - you didnt hurt him - you did exactly what you were supposed to do when you feel like this - put him down and walk away - hes sleeping now - hes perfect. Please dont be so hard on yourself! I hate the way we do this - you sound like a perfect mammy! xx hope your ok

BarbieLovesKen · 26/07/2007 21:36

just have to add that even the fact that you didnt do anything wrong and yet feel awful is so sweet in a way - you sound like such a caring, loving mother - your son is very, very lucky to have you!!.

Original poster

gr8kids · 26/07/2007 21:42

Wow,I cant believe all the support im getting. Didn't think i'd have so many people out there that actually care. Thank you all so much. Needless to say I didn't get a nap with him. I took my dd1+2,ds and went for drive in pouring rain. Took all 3 for a haircut and dd1 made us pizza for tea and we had loadsa chocolate afterwards. Have just put him down for the night,looks like we got a winner (for now). Im in two minds about what i want to do now!!?? Have bath,watch sleepless in seattle, read,sleep,run round the block,do washing???

OP posts:

funnypeevesculiar · 26/07/2007 21:47

Just to add to everyone else - totally, TOTALLY know that feeling - can remember only too well putting ds in his cot and punching the pillow so as not to punch him
You sound like you're doing a wonderful job, and he (& his sisters) are lucky to have you ... and now I instruct you to have a bath and go to sleep - go on, off you go

callmeovercautious · 26/07/2007 21:56

See chocolate does do miracles!!!!
Glad you seem to be feeling better. GO TO BED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

perhaps after a nice bath and glass of white!

Original poster

gr8kids · 26/07/2007 21:56

Good idea! Off i go! Thanx again everyone

OP posts:

callmeovercautious · 26/07/2007 21:57

p.s welcome to the power of MN!

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